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Sat.02.May: 7.57 Another late day... but then, it was a “late” night. Mid-night, or there-about. And a v-ton before bed. So indeed... up at about 7.00, coffee on, the usual routine, in from a smoke and... a lie-down on the futon. Bark, bark, bark... “Zeke”... Peter's been out front. And now I'm rather reminded of the “Good Folks of New Russia” and the “highway clean-up” this morning. The gathering has commenced but I have not (and I've no intention of doing any-thing of the sort). I MIGHT... if there's a knock on the door, but other-wise... I rather doubt it. (I'll be town-toddling tomorrow... in the 20°. There's my “exercise.) As for the morning? Quite clear. Quite bright. Quite comfy. Quite dragging... I wouldn't much mind going back to bed, to be honest, but... here I am and here I'll be and let's see how we roll from here... along... “merrily” (pfftt!) - 9.48 This day is dragging and the fucking key-board is fucking about (there's been another “up-date” to the soft-ware, of fucking course). I'm “doing” shit-for-all but I've done with coffee, the sun is shining, there's a pile of “orange trash bags” at the corner from the “Good Folks highway cleaning” and Suzie's boxed the day's post. E-mails show that oils and seeds ordered yesterday are en route. And I'm pondering a day of raking in the yard. I might not be strolling along the “highway” with the “Good Folks” but this IS the post office and THE intersection of “centre city New Russia” and I AM doing my best to make it presentable. So... FUKKOFF! - I want to go back to bed! - 16.24 Nope... no bed, no snooze, no nap, no TEA! Went out the door at about 10.30 and am JUST getting in from more raking of the back yard, started to dig down that mound of dirt, hooked-up a hose for the gardens in the back, swept Simonds Hill, chatted with Vivian (who said it would be fine if I thinned the lilies and believes Alden will be quite happy about my working on the grounds). Chatted with “Dan” who bought the place on Lakota. Says he, the place wasn't any-where as bad as “talk round town” had it. (Of course it wasn't. These people are “old”... and then there's that idiot Biddy... And speaking of Biddy.... I'm to understand that Becky Biddy told Dan (of “Dan and Mike” who are from Long Island, by the way) to use some-body ELSE'S MAIL BOX! SERIOUSLY! 'tis time to test the Pee-of-Oh here. I'm not liking this bull-shit at all. Any-way, nice chat with Dan and Vivian and all that. And it's been a hot and clear sort of day. Would have been nice in shorts but... One of thee days... when I can get away again (IF that ever happens again). - Now... for cold meal and perhaps A drink after. - Tomorrow is town-toddle to be sure. But for now... for now. - There's a shower coming very soon - I'm EXHAUSTED! Pretty good for a day that appeared useless when it began. - 22.18 Right... Showered. Clean. Done. To bed. Rain in forecast for over-night. FUCKING HOT for tomorrow... Let's see how it all works out. FUCK! I'm not looking forward to this... in the HEAT!
Sun.03.May: 7.24 On a sunny morn... thus far. Imagine... NO FURNACE ON ALL NIGHT! AT LAST! And my right shoulder is sore and I don't know why. I'm dressed and all and in no mood for this toddle today. But it surely must be done, though I'm expecting GREAT DISAPPOINTMENTS. Oh well... Simply move along. - Woke at about 2.00, as I recall and went back to sleep and then, at about 7.00, woke again and got out of the bed. Why? Oh, that's always the question. But here I am and the day has begun and we roll. - Making another little list of things I want to get today. (I'd rather pfutz round the house but...) - So along we go. We do what we must for as long as we must and when it's all done and we mustn't or can't... we stop. Amen. - 19.55 HEY! Very cute. AND WHAT A DAY! INDEED! Left here at about 10.00 with the sun in the sky and the breezes blowing chilled and the HEAT COMIN' ON STRONG! AND YES, I *DID* WALK THE *ENTIRE* DISTANCE (to AND from). First stop, Kinney's where I took my time, pretty much, looking for shampoo, Tea Tree oil, bandages (for the arm-pit) and DenTemp. NO fucking iron-on patches so it appears I might have to either wait until I can get to Walmarde or order from Ambazoom. (I think I'll wait for Walmarde.) Next... to Tops where there was NO FUCKING CHICKEN AGAIN! BUT I spent a FORTUNE on boneless, got some olive oil, and butter (full price) and that 18-eggs... &c. and came in just under the 40$ I had. Not too bad but... of course, there was more I wanted and forgot to get. Still, at that point, I figured I didn't have enough on the card... more on that to follow. OK... on to FamDoll for 4 SHEERS for the living-room, 5 smokes and a can of hornet spray (whilst waiting for the peppermint oil any-way). Pretty much took my time with that as well. - Of not today... there was a woman in Kinneys AND the crazy one in FamDoll... NO MASK! As I sent to Theresa after “The Revolution has begun!” - Okie-dokie... shopping done and the trek back to the home... in the SUN AND the HEAT! It's presently 20°! So it HAD to have been about 25° this after-noon! I say, it was difficult walking because of the heat and my chest was “heavy”, my hands SO SWOLLEN! BUT... with the exception of a stop at the horses, it was steady going until, at 14.30... I ARRIVED! 4 and a half hours OUT in the “fresh air and sun-shine”. (Fresh air my hemorrhoids! My face is GRITTY tonight!) Noting: Tomorrow is supposed to be 11 BUT TUESDAY NIGHT? - (yes, MINUS) 1! OK. Fine. - SO... immediately in, butter and chicken into fridge, “stuff” on the kitchen table and such BUT... I got RIGHT to putting the sheers up in the living-room... on surveyor's twine with thum-tacks AND IT'S BEAUTIFUL! I MEAN.... EVEN WITH 2 PANNELS PER WINDOW... IT'S BEAUTIFUL! AND IT DOES CUT THE VISIBILITY IN THE HOUSE BUT... I OPENED THE WINDOWS AND THE BREEZE WAS BEAUTIFUL-GAWJUS! I SHOULD HAVE DONE THIS MONTHS AGO! I'M SO HAPPY WITH THE WAY IT IS NOW! - Fine... 17.00 “meal”: 4 eggs with the left-over rice scrambled in. I was in NO mood to cook! And I'd been on text with Theresa through all the work. Of course, by 18.00, every-thing was done (but the chicken needs to be put into the freezer as I type). - BALANCE THE BOOKS! TO MY SHOCK... I looked at the remaining balance of FS on the receipt... THE IDIOTS POSTED TWO PAYMENTS OF 62$ ON THE 28TH OF LAST MONTH! I HAD MUCH MORE THAN I'D THOUGHT! I COULD HAVE GOTTEN MORE FOOD TODAY! ALTHOUGH... it's NOT the 200$ that Hannah had said we were supposed to get. But still... more is more and more food... NOW... if ONLY the fucking market would HAVE food! (Julius was at the market today and when he asked “How's it going?” I just pointed to the almost empty chicken. He said “I'm getting tired of this.” meaning, he too, is tired of the bull-shit.) OK so any-way there we have it. QUITE the day! - Now, the house is settled again. I've got the curtains open with the sheers. I want to check them later, before going to bed, to see how well they are at night... curiosity. Still, they're beautiful and make the place more “homey”! LUUUUV IT! - Next item...
E-mail from Liz! At 15.06 she RE-SENT that “note” I'd written back in 2000! With the message:
“Since emails are sometimes missed I had meant to resend this a few years ago.
I do still have the original.
Everything is packed up, I am in the process of moving, but once unpacked you know I can send you that should you want though I expect digital is better and easier to store
Hope you are ,and continue to do , well, not just in the time of PAUSE but always
Take care
Always
L”
Seriously? I've NO inclination to even respond/reply. Another “Schmulik” situation “You no me.” No... there's a reason, a DAMNED GREAT reason why I haven't corresponded with either of you... Life has been peaceful where you two are concerned and I'm NOT going to muck that up. No... not being mean, evil or such. Just not being an idiot again. “Everything is packed up, I am in the process of moving...”? What? Mummie kicked-off and the rest of the clan won't pamper you? Or what? Can't care, really. She has no idea (or I might think so) where I am these days so... let it be... And so I shall.
And now... at 20.21, I'm pondering a v-ton or not. Tried phoning Theresa before sitting to type this. No answer. It might be “Battle Star” night with her Lucas tonight. I don't know. But, what-ever the case or situation, I DO need to ring AAA tomorrow AND as much as I don't really want to... Avery. So? And with AAA there's going to be some walking to Richie's and I might toddle back into town for a few more provisions... so it's probably better that I have ONLY ONE beverage IF ANY... and get me to bed! The sun's dropping. - But quite the day! Hot. Warm, sunny evening. Curtains flowing in the breeze. GOODNESS ME! - (*SOME-THINGS GOT TO FUCK THIS UP!!!*) - 24.29 Too long on the line with Theresa and now... Off to the quick shower and into the bed! MUCH to do tomorrow... later. (And yes... I had ONE v-ton. It's enough.)
Mon.04.May (TRUCK TOWED TO RICHIE): 7.39 Not too bad for having stayed in the bed until 7.08... I haven't lost any time, really. Won't ring AAA until later any-way. So? So. And when they tow... IF they tow... being here, in the midst of no-where, I don't MUST go into town today. Which is probably a better idea that going into town considering the “pain” in the upper-right of the chest... you know... the place where the CT scan “found nodules” back in the “New England” days. Oh, alas. Other-wise, the sun is shining, the breezes are blowing and it's a tolerable sort of temperature, not too hot, not too chilled. Oh, and the birds are chirping and the curtains are open. How charming. Coffee at hand and here we go... or not... or yes... or no. The ONLY way to KNOW how this day will be is... when it's done. - I've got chicken to put up this morning so... may as well get on with it. I'm awake. Time to “do”. - 11.14 I NEED TO STOP MY BRAIN FOR A WHILE! THE TRUCK IS, BY NOW, AT RICHIE'S. I called this morning to see if it would be OK to send it along and Richie was in good spirits. I COULDN'T GO ALONG WITH THE TRUCK (because of this “covid” bull-shit) but Richie said there was no reason why I should. “I probably won't get to it until tomorrow anyway.” No prob. Two truck had to come all the way from Lake Placid! AND... the guy says... ALL mechanics are open! AND... the registration CAN be changed on-line! I can mail the forms in and they'll probably send a “temp” in the post. Yeah... if only I could afford all this shit right now. I'm a MESS! Bowels want to burst. Head aches. Bladder's on “over-drive”. Chest is a solid rock. Stupid, really, but... that's me. - Meanwhile, the breezes are blowing. Thermometer on the porch reads 52F and the furnace is running and I feel like it's -52C! Nerves. Insanity. Oh well... - I suppose I'll get to the chicken in the fridge and then figure a way to fill the rest of the day. - OH! AND THE TRUCK'S COMPLETELY DEAD. TURNED THE KEY AND NOTHING... NO LIGHTS... NOTHING. SPENT THE MORNING LOOKING AT RECEIPTS FOR WORK DONE. FUCKING PISSES ME OFF. MORE BRAKE WORK AND REPEAT BRAKE WORK AND SHIT! *** BUT THE TOW-GUY SAID THE FRAME'S IN PERFECT CONDITION! “THAT'S A KEEPER RIGHT THERE.” Nice... Not “comforting” but nice. - Well, almost “tea time”. Texting with Theresa who' in Missouri at the moment, getting gas, under blue skies. Ah well then... - 15.41 “Napped”... from only moments after I'd entered the previous! SO... that “snooze”, in spite of the 40-minute alarm, was... almost THREE HOURS! Do i care? Nope. Am I missing anything? Nope. AND... it was almost impossible to get up off the futon as it was! So? So... - The skies are still on the grey side, the breezes are light wind and it's still cold. So much for Monday. Chicken is in the oven. I've nothing to go with but I don't care about that either. Will toss my cookies later and that's that for this and that. - 22.45 In from last smoke. “Meal” was quiet good: boneless chicken breast and Ramen with butter and cheese. COOKIES for dessert. And I've had entirely TOO much sugar today! - I don't want to go to bed. I'm full of ANGST over the truck. PLEASE NO MORE THAN 1500$! FOR ALL! PLEASE!!! - Anyway... there's nothing I can do now, save, call AAA and have them bring the truck back. - NEED more oil too. There's money in the account but I don't dare to touch it until I learn the price of the truck. The guy said “the frame' solid... that's a keeper”. Yeah... the frame's great. The rest is breaking me! - Oh well... off to teeth and bed. Let's see what comes tomorrow. 10° and clear. Hopefully no WIND! I might toddle... just to keep moving. I want to plant but there's freezing in the forecast and more snow. Oh well... it's only May. And none of the tomato seeds are sprouting and there's more on the way. Disaster! - Off to bed... as the fucking furnace kicks again. SHIT!
Tue.05.May: (TeaTree to skin-tag) 7.27 and here we are, out of bed at 7.00 sharp, lavage in the basins, soaking, sun shining, winds blowing, 2° and another day... heavy-chested but in from a halfie and again, another day. - Had a rather odd dream last night, before waking at 2.00, then again at about 4.00... Nuns... I can't recall ALL of the particulars, but I was in a group of many Dominicans... “Blauvelt”!, as one rather yelled as I said it as well. I was defending them to some-one, vehemently and sincerely, saying that they should be brought back, as they were when I was in school. Imagine that. I can't think of what would bring that sort of a dream on but there it was. Unless it's an unconscious association with the e-mail from Liz. “Packed” and “moving”? I have to wonder. Oh well. - Anyway, still pondering a toddle today... but then, making excuses as to why I don't have to and shouldn't. There really isn't any-thing I MUST toddle for. But with a high of only 9, I could get ice cream (IF they have ANY in stock). Cranberry juice, peanut-butter, vanilla... out in the house. And Theresa mentioned having made meat-loaf and I thought I could give that a go... bake the fat and what-ever it might be that makes me ill out of it. No rush. Wouldn't leave here until 10.00 any-way and there's lavage on the soak. So we shall see. - Anxieties related to the truck are, of course, weighing. But good sense is present: there's nothing I can do until I know what's going on. Just bothers me that it was completely OUT yesterday. Not even a light! Oh well... JUST NO MORE THAN 1500$ PLEASE! - Time to move along. Furnace is up to rid the chill. What-ever will be... will be. - Hell... there's no guarantee that I'll live through this one. THAT would “take care of EVERYTHING”! - 7.54 Finally got April on-line. So there's one thing “accomplished”... BFD... on we move. - 9.40 Lavage on the rack, last coffee at hand. In from another smoke. Things are settling. Time to seriously consider a toddle. Not in the mood, but... The morning runs into ... - A lot of “air traffic” this morning. Oddly, can't see the planes, but wow, how the engines roar across the skies. I wonder. - 12.35 Cedar oil arrived today and I pissed some time away filling air-oils and the likes so now... with the wind blowing a tad too much, no toddling. There's always “tomorrow”... IF I happen to wake tomorrow at all. I also pissed an hour away snoozing. It's about the tiredness that's getting to me now. Anxiety? Something “in” me? What? Just tired. So tired. I can't care, really. What's to come will come when it comes. That's all there is to it. - No word on the truck. Not that I'm in any particular hurry at this point. Walking is what I've done for months... and walking is what I'll continue to do. - Then there's the price of heating oil and whether or not I can afford it and this morning's news brought the word that the price is rising again. Fucked again... just fucked again. Oh well... If I'm NOT fucked... THAT'S when I need to worry most. - So no meat-loaf tonight. No prob. No toddling. I'll just have to “fill the rest of the day”... - 22.36 Well... the “event” of the day was the first application of Tea Tree oil to the skin tag under my left arm. WOW! Is the fragrance POTENT! I smell it all the time now! But, it isn't burning so I'm happy about that. It does break-down the adhesive on the bandage though so I have to get larger bandages. On the list for tomorrow's toddle. - Other-wise, I have to say that I've been SO TIRED most of the day. Took a morning snooze and then another before “meal” (which was spaghetti... not Angel Hair though... I bought regular spaghetti and I don't like it... too thick, ick, but it sufficed) and a piece of chicken... I'm on the last of the thighs, but the boneless breasts aren't all that bad so I might be getting more of those in future. - Did manage to get ALL of the lavage done this morning and it's still damp, but honestly, I didn't even bother to wring it before hanging and I put it out-side and it wasn't all warm enough to dry. Oh well... no prob. - Tossed the bone meal into the garden and tilled a bit. (I'm making it all sound more “accomplished” than this day actually has been.) - The latest “scare” is some “Murder Hornet” from Japan now. The more I research the more I see it's much like (if not the very same) that “European Hornet” that stung me on Cox Rd. some years ago. I'm not looking forward to more of those shits buzzing about and am glad I got the can of Raid already. Must get more, I should think. - The day was mostly brightish, but too chilly and too windy to toddle so I'm putting it on tomorrow's list. - The cedar oil arrived today too! I put some into the “warmers” and it gives a very light fragrance to the house. (Although, the only thing I can smell is Tea Tree now.) I'm glad to have it. Pine and Peppermint to follow... and the rest of the seeds. At the rate time and temperature are running here, it's not looking good for this year's garden. I'm pissed. - No word about the truck. But they do say Richie is “good”, “fair” but not “quick”. Hell. I've gone SO long with-out wheels that it almost doesn't make any difference at this juncture. I just hope it's not COSTLY to get the truck back on the road, even if it's only for my weekly shopping (monthly, more like it). - The “heaviness” in the chest has been quite noticeable all day today too. Anxieties or angst or... maybe it actually IS “CHF”. I don't know. Don't care, really. It's just annoying though. But as the day progresses, it gets lighter... movement is the key. Tomorrow there will be some of that as I don't expect any lifts. - And now, it's late and time to get to bed. By not later than 10.30 I want to be on the road tomorrow. I've a good list of provisions needed... and there's funds to cover them... for a change. - Well? That's the end of this day. - Oh, one item: Just East of Jay is a peak called “Bitch Mountain”. I'd LIKE to go see that, if possible. And I want to take a hike along the Roaring Brook to see where the “roaring” I can hear at night actually is. Things to do... when... if... - Off to bed. Tomorrow... if it happens... is another day.
Wed.06.May: 7.05 And WHY I'm up and about and dressed and in from a smoke at this hour, I've NO idea. Not even the slightest of clues, to be honest. I woke at about 6.30-ish, had to pee and, well... if you're up, you're up. So I presently got to putting on the kettle, having a bit of a pee. When the kettle boiled, put the coffee together and... as I put the screen in the press, pressed coffee onto the stove! SO... ALL 4 burners got cleaned this morning as the coffee steeped. How charming. - Meanwhile, out-side, there's frost... FROST on EVERY-THING! We had a “hard frost” last night. Cliff's daffodils don't look any too pleased. Météo is telling me that it's 2° out there in the sun-shine. It's not THAT cold, but it certainly WAS cold enough over-night, obviously. Should be going up to 11° by midi, with nuages, so it'll be an “interesting” toddle today. And indeed, there will be a toddle at some point. Right now, I'd like to have coffee and take a snooze. - The Tea Tree oil is starting to irritate, but no matter how I'd chosen to approach this “project” there would be some sort of “discomfort”. But the band-aid stayed on during the night so I'm pleased with that much... in spite of the redness around. I'll get better bandages today. - Ah... I see a -3° for Friday night here, and 0° through next Wednesday... nights, thankfully. And next Wednesday is the 13th... so much for planting on the 10th? - So any-way, last night's read left me with a giggle and a chuckle at lights-out. That was welcomed... hopefully this is a humorous side of Salinger? I could use some dry humour right about now. But lights went out at mid-night and so this is 6,5hours of “sleep”... and sleep I got, through the night. Let's not whine. - Well? I'm up and about. May as well “do”... what-ever. - 10.39 Morning is done... soc.med. and such. House is in order. And truthfully, I am NOT looking forward to this toddle but... a quick trip to the loo and OFF WE GO! - 15.58 FUCK! I THOUGHT I'd left at about 10.30 but I'd no sooner gotten to Richie's when SUZIE pulled-up... She WAITED for me at Richie's! Dropped me at the liquor store and almost demanded that I tell her when I need to go into town! (I wonder why she's so sweet.) - Got my vodka (in addition to what was already here), then to Kinney's for bandages and Cute-tits and Cot'n'balls and it was on to Tops for beef, veggies, vanilla, beans, cranberry juice... stuff. ALMOST all of my list! NEXT? FamDoll for the sheers for the bed-room, 3 packs of smokes and thumb tacks. DONE! Quite the haul! Walked all the way back, of course. But it was pretty much OK. Just a touch on the “hot” side of weather, under the hazy sun and mostly cloudy. Walked in at 14.20! Un-packed the shit and got to putting the fucking “Chinese” sheers up on the window with the fucking “Chinese” thumb-tacks that fucking BENT! Took the better part of 90-fucking-minutes! I'm PISSED... and looking forward to a DRINK! EVER SO SOON! - And now? “Cigarettes After Sex” on the serenade in the parlour as I sit at kitchen table... Cold chicken, some veggies... I'll make the meat-loaf for tomorrow evening... IF I actually wake tomorrow morning... or tomorrow at all. I'm in a REALLY SUPER FUCKING PISSED mood right now. This 'Made In China” bull-shit is gnawing at me now. But... there's nothing on the agenda for tomorrow and nothing to come tonight. I'm... DONE!
Thu.07.May: 9.23 It was another 2.00-to-bed night/morning on the phone with Theresa. AND a THREE v-ton all-nighter. I swear to my-self I'll never do that and then? I do that. Thankfully, no alarms this morning, BUT A CALL FROM RICHIE AT 8.55... that I missed because the phone was in the drawing-room and I was not. So? So... I'm dressed, have had first coffee and half-smoke and the sun is shining, it's warm, the air's cool and here we go. (I should go back to bed but I won't. I'm just waiting for “awake” to kick in at the moment.) - Feeling? Really, no different from most other mornings, other than the anxiety of the truck... Nope, no different from most other mornings. - Now... on with what ever. At least yesterday is gone. - 12.58 Well? “Baby's” back in the drive and 219,24$ spent... BUT... TOTAL: 228,01 BECAUSE OF A “NON-CASH CHARGE” OF 8,77!!! Oh well... They put in a new battery (which is something I've thought about needing since I first got the truck) and topped the power-steering fluid. “No leaks found”, reads the receipt. Richie says “I have no idea where it went. Take it up to Lake Placid!” Yeah... right... not... don't think so. It might have been nice but I'm not going up into the mountains until I KNOW it's ALL OK. First trip... the dump! Get rid of this garbage! But for now... my chest is a mess today. Theresa's been with the texting. “When's the next 'Farewell Tour'?” I just replied with all the work that I KNOW has to be done. Honestly, I know she means well and it would be fun to be able to get on the road and visit and such, but seriously? Probably looking forward to me saying “I'm heading to Illinois in the morning!” Anyway and... Meanwhile... there's a “buzz” at the alternator. Looking that up. Richie says it needs to be run because of sitting all Winter. We shall see... - 15.02 WELL? BABY'S BACK IN HOSPITAL... DIDN'T I KNOW IT WAS ALL TOO CHEAP AND GOOD TO BE TRUE? I GOT BACK, PARKED AT THE GARAGE, GOT TO THE TRASH BIN IN THE BACK AND GATHERED MOST OF THE GARBAGE FROM AROUND THE PLACE, LOOKED-UP THE HOURS FOR THE DUMP... FORTUNATELY TODAY WAS “OPEN” UNTIL 17.00! RE-STARTED THE TRUCK JUST FINE, DROVE ROUND THE HOUSE TO THE BACK, LOADED 2 BAGS OF GARBAGE INTO THE BACK AND HEADED FOR LEWIS. WHEN I GOT INTO TOWN, THOUGHT I'D FILL THE TANK WHILST ON THE ROAD. THERE WAS HALF A TANK ANYWAY BUT THAT'S BEEN IN THERE ALL WINTER SO... *** WHEN I TRIED TO MAKE THE RIGHT TURN TO GO TO THE STATION... *** NO POWER STEERING AGAIN!!! *** AND TURNING MADE THE WORST GRINDING NOISE! BUT I MANAGED TO MAKE IT TO THE PUMP. GOT GAS, PUT THE TRUCK BACK INTO 2-WHEEL DRIVE WHICH MADE STEERING ONLY SLIGHTLY EASIER AND WENT DIRECTLY TO THE DUMP WHERE... AT LONG LAST... THE GARBAGE IS GONE!!! WHEN I WENT BACK TO THE TRUCK I SAW IT... BREAK FLUID LEAKING FROM THE FRONT DRIVER'S SIDE! SO? SO... WITH A BIT OF DIFFICULTY... BACK TO THE GARAGE. FUCK!!!!! - When I got back, Richie was on the phone, there was a spinsterish woman standing at counter. Richie looked up and said “Jude's back! What happened?” So I told him. Ben came out to have a look and remarked “Oh SHIT!” There was break fluid splattered all over! He checked around, said there's a “cooler” for the breaks and that that's the trouble. Mentioned something about the rotor being a touch rusty... “probably from sitting all Winter”. Then... “I'll have to order the part and won't get to it until Monday because we're closed.” Something about “People heard we're open and they're all coming in.” Hey... no problem for me. I'm more accustomed to walking than driving now any-way. And then we got talking about politics (he too... another Conservative... it's SO refreshing) and some-how the Catskills came into the chat. BUT WHAT FLOORED ME: HE ASKED WHERE MY RELATIVES ARE FROM IN THE CATSKILLS AND... IN THE MID-70s HE LIVED ON THE ROSE VALLEY ROAD! AND HAD A GARAGE IN ROCK HILL!!! IF THAT DON'T BEAT ALL. We both agreed that we're happier up here in the Adirondacks and... well... when I left there ... to WALK BACK to the house again... I was smiling all the way, anxious to get to talk with Donna about this! And yes, I DID smile... all along the walk. - 22.19 Managed to screw the rest of the day all to fuck. When I got back to the house earlier, I tried Donna's number but it was occupied so I rang Theresa and was on the wire FAR for entirely too long. Then, at about 16.00 or so, got a hold of Donna to tell her about Ben and she wanted to know his last name and such. “I dated so many guys back then.” She must have been “quite the 'quite-the'”... “back then”... immediately thinking of guys-dated. Anyway, we chatted and I started to throw a meat-loaf together but had to work with one hand because of the mobile. Donna's Candy woke and she went to feed her and I got to making a 3lb meat loaf. Beef! It's been a long time. One thing... as usual, the beef was FATTY (so much so that the meat loaf SWAM in the fucking fat)! I FINALLY got to sit and eat... only 2 slices of meat-loaf.. nothing to go with, fuck... at about 19.30!!!! FUCK! - But whilst the meat-loaf baked, I managed to get the lupine seeds and the Beefsteak tomatoes into the cartons. So there's that much that actually got “accomplished in all this whirl-wind of a day. Hey... I suppose I should be rather happy about ALL of what “actually got accomplished”... seeds, truck back and forth, GARBAGE IS GONE AT LONG LAST. But I am SO FUCKING EXHAUSTED... REALLY BLOODY-FUCKING EXHAUSTED!!! I don't want to go right to bed after the heaviness of the beef and I know it isn't going to “settle well” but... sensibly, it's time for last smoke and to bed.... Another day is gone and done and done and gone and it's time to give it up... If I wake... there will be more time for more shit tomorrow.
Fri.08.May: 6.09 Heard the alarm and slept until... 5.51 and I could actually go right back to bed in spite of being dressed and having had a coffee and half-smoke. - Sun's up. Clouds hanging. Smoke from chimneys across the road. 2°, so they claim. And here we are. And when I went to bed last night, to read a bit, I was SO tired! And this morning is more anxieties because of the truck and the heating oil and well... all said, it's another day. I've a few “items” on my list of what I'd like to do with this day but... here we go. Roll along with it. Just roll... - 6.50 Well... I've been at a re-capture of yesterday's bull-shittery all the while. The sun's rising delightfully as I sit at the “work table” here, there's a chill to the house (of course there is) and I've yet to get to actual COFFEE! SO... KADIMA!... and shit. - 10.06 WELL! The marigolds are thinned and planted in 6 individual “cups”. Those will be for the south side of the house (if they survive). Little “tags” are on the boxes so I know what's in which. I re-filled the bag of “potting” dirt from the back garden, measured and plotted the actual garden (working with a 5x10ft plot... imagine that). Cut soda bottles for wasp-traps AND actually made “funnels” from the tops of the vodka bottles! The sun is shining. The chilly breeze is blowing. And I'm about to have a snooze because, well... I keep sneezing and I don't know why... and I'm feeling a touch “off” this morning. Oh well... “Off” it is then. - 16.06 It's been quite the day ! First of all, let me note that I ORDERED 200 GALLONS OF OIL TO BE DELIVERED ON TUESDAY... PAID ALREADY AT 358$! Yes, it's 10-cents more per gallon than it was when the folks next-door got theirs... a couple of weeks ago, BUT it SAVED me 240! AND... if usage follows this past Winter... THIS should last me into DECEMBER at least! Does it cut me short other-wise? Sure. But I'd rather know that I'll be warm enough for long enough. And it gives me a chance to save for the coming Winter. - That said, I put “tags” on the boxes of seeds so I can keep track of what's where. Then, transplanted some Burpee marigolds into 6 frosting containers. - Next? The humming-bird feeder is up on the front porch, in case the little ones return early. I saw some-body up the road having hung theirs already, and the little ones are known to “return” in May so... they'll have some nourishment, should they come “too soon”. - The “wasp traps” are cut and at the ready to fill and put up where needed. - The garden got raked and plotted for when-ever THAT may come to be. - Then I went out back and pulled the “volunteer” maples up before they take residence. - The garbage bin out back got a quick washing. - And THEN... came the bread. Two loaves in the oven on a second rise (I hope). - Meanwhile, of particular note, Ms. Biddybitch was in the Pee-Oh today, with Suzie... for the better part of an hour! (Yes, I rather, some-what anonymously “reported” the incident, on-line.) Top it off? SHE put the fucking wind-chimes back up! So, I figure, SHE doesn't work here, doesn't live here, doesn't pay the rent here, shouldn't be on Postal property any-way so... I've taken the shit down. It's in the living-room. I'll wait to see if it's noticed. If so, shit will hit the fan. - Additional note of fucking insantiy: Julius came out to chat whilst I worked on the garden and informs: The once-upon-a-time FREE golf course in town has, this year, initiated a “Membership” only sort of situation where-by people are no longer allowed to “walk in”. Annual fee? 200$!!! “Membership” AND fees of about half of my MONTHLY rent! WHAT the fuck? I said “One of these days, some-body's going to completely lose it and...” Yes, indeed... how I long for that moment to come. - So now, time to put the oven on, bake the bread, heat the meat-loaf. “Stew” veggies are boiling on the stove. Meal will be a t 17.00 and another day will have passed. But at least I managed to get out into the air... “do” some-thing. - Oh... and Mr. Alvin is “stacking” what looks to be about 4 cords of fire-wood. “Hauling” it in the wheel-barrow. I see, saw, noted and thought “I offered to help. He said he enjoys it.” So be it. - 24.18 SO much fr the planned shower tonight. TOO MANY HOURS on the line with Theresa. She's all bummed because the Gov. closed the churches down across the state “until there's a vaccine for” the fucking “covid”. Me? Personally? Hey! Jews haven't been bothered by no synagogues... and from my own personal history with “Christians” and Catholics... I can't say I have any compassion or sympathy. - Off to bed, directly.
Sat.09.May: 11.06 Another one of those “slow” starts to the day. I woke at 6.00 and went back to sleep. Then again, up at about 7.00 to pee and... back to bed to sleep until that “odd” hour of “9.11” when I actually got up, put on the coffee and dragged about to get dressed. And what greeted me this morning? *** SNOW-COVERED MOUNTAINS AND YARD! *** I saw it coming yesterday and watched it accumulate late, last night. But this morning, the skies were blue, the sun was shining and it all looked more like a December morn than May. (Even now, as I type, there's the sun to the East and the snows to the West and flurries all around.) And it's one of those days where the sun wants to be “60F” but the winds control “30F”. Patches of grass are visible, the “garden” in the back is “clear”, but next door on both sides of the house, there's snow, snow and more snow. I sent photos to Theresa and Donna. Theresa replies “Winter wonderland... but in May!” Meanwhile, I've got the furnace going a bit (since there's 200 gallons coming on Tuesday). It's not “cold” in the house but it's certainly not “warm” either. - I'm still working on morning coffee (as “Tea-time” approaches). - When I went out at about 10.00 to take photos, Suzie was boxing the mail. I asked if there was any-thing for me, she said “I don't think so. It's a light mail day.” Sadly, I don't trust her with such things, particularly because she refers to Biddy as her “friend” and, that whole business with that miserable Vermont-shit being in the office for over an hour, after closing, yesterday... and the “wind-chime” business. (That thing is now carefully wrapped in news-print and stuffed-away. Yes, I DID simply walk out the door and remove it yesterday. And I don't give a shit. When next I head to the dump... it will go. I'm PAYING RENT here, have established this as my “legal residence”, am putting effort into making it “presentable” and have been battered by rumours and bull-shit by the Pee-Oh. So? I'm taking my legal rights to “peaceful enjoyment”... and that shit on the pillars is a “disturbance of the peace”. - Other-wise, it's a “slow day”. My brain doesn't want to focus on any-thing, the body wants to get out and “do” something but there's no sense in it because of the snow. - OH! Ms. Suzie complained because the ramp to the Pee-Oh was icy this morning when she arrived. (Of course it was... because *I* didn't get out there to clear it before her arrival.) Well, well, and well... How many times did *I* get to work early to clear parking lots and entry-ways for how many post offices? The service is getting the space for free, I'm paying the hot water, John A. ploughs, and WE PAY FOR OUR BOXES on top of it all. I've no compassion. Fukkem! Fukkemall!” - The transplanted marigolds of yesterday appear to be doing fine. The “Steak Sandwich” tomatoes have ONE sprouting. The Cypress Vines in the living-room are trying to twist round the other plants... poor things want OUT! The winds are now howling, the sky's gone grey and the SNOW is blowing all over the place! Well? Back to Winter... and I need to find something to fill the time... IN-doors, I'm afraid. - (I just HOPE the garage folks closed the door on the truck! Fuck.) -
12.55 Well? The snows come and the snows goes... the sun tries to fill-in the space between. Ms. Suzie's gone, New Russia is calmed again, there's more grass showing but the temperatures hover around the freeze. The furnace has been running rather regularly but not very warm. I KNOW there's MORE than enough oil in the tank but... The ice and snow on the roof is melting and dropping (says Suzie: “It's scary.”). AND... I've put photos on the on-line journal and managed to post to-date. - As for the rest of the day? I really can't decide. No out-of-doors workings today and not too much other than some artsy stuff on my “list” (cards and perhaps an illumination for Theresa). But what I see coming is... SNOOZE! - ONE SUNFLOWER HAS SPROUTED THIS MORNING! Seems it happened with-in moments because when I looked earlier, there was nothing. ONE... May it be the first of ALL of the 36! Not that there's a particular rush since this “freeze” isn't expected to pass until the 15th. Alas and oh well... On with the day... - 21.13 It's been marvellously silent, save the narrations of sea & dragonfly videos. - Meal commenced at 17.00 and was completely done, washing-up and all, by 17.45. Sad, really. Meatloaf, veggies... cookies... with chocolate frosting between. All gone, of course. - The snow continued through the day, on and off, here and there, now and then. It's minus 1 now and most of the day's snow is gone from down here but still up on the mountains. - And me? I'm off for last smoke, then a shower and then to bed. Will work around the house tomorrow (if at all) and go into town on Monday when I can change keys at Richie's. Other than that? Another day... gone.
Sun.10.May: 8.48 and I didn't crawl, rather un-willingly, out of the bed until almost 8.30 to pee, put on the coffee, water the plants and open the blinds to...? SNOW on the mountains, clouds over-head, and flocons dancing about on the relatively still air. And as I type this, at the “plant table” now, the flocons are gathering closer together and becoming a bit of a “snowing”. Météo claims it's 3° and so it very well might be. The high for the day is expected to be 9°. But we shall see what we see when we see it. And the furnace is on, blowing warmer air about the house. And it's May... “Mothers' Day” as well. Imagine that. As Spring should be turning to Summer, it's more like Summer turning to Autumn (and almost Autumn turning to Winter... again). Alas. - I've a little list of “To Be Dones”, thinning lilies, seeding porch planters, moving soil about... and I should get to the river to fill the plant water again. Ah... let's just see what actually gets done. - Meanwhile, I'm in the “daily” clothes again, just in case I DO get to DO some-thing or another, but scrubbed from last night's shower. - Had a lovely sleep last night though. And I might even suspect almost 9 hours worth of sleep at that. Why? Simply because. What it does for the day is to be seen as well. But for now... coffee's waiting, I've had my half-smoke and 'tis time to animate... One might suppose. - 16.02 Re-arranged the seedlings in the drawing-room today. Put sunflowers, marigolds and Cypress vines up on the wall shelves. Then... had a few slices of bread and butter with ginger tea and then... a nap for almost an hour. Woke from that, went out-side and had to carry the planters from porch to back garden to fill them with soil, then, with the hand-cart (the wheel-barrow is next door... figures), bring them back to the porch, carry them into the drawing room and put the rest of the marigold seeds into them. They're “seeded” now. I doubt they'll sprout on time but... there they are. - It's been a particularly difficult day, breathing-wise. And this morning's snows ended and the sun is shining brilliantly and the temperature is rising. I was COLD all morning though. And I'm really quite fatigued now. Yes, a particularly difficult day, health-wise. - Managed to post a “Happy Mudders' Day” animation on Minds-author. Theresa replied, I'm the first to wish her Happy Mothers' Day. Then she sent me 2 photos via text. The experience on Minds was particularly nasty in some responses to some of my recent posts. I'm about to step back and away... although I do have other accounts to browse and keep abreast. Still... it's not worth the annoyances. - I can't believe this day has gone by already and I've “accomplished” almost nothing with it. But then again, I DID want to simply go back to bed this morning. - Looking forward to being able to head up the mountains at some point soon. I'd LIKE to see if I can't get some bloodroot (though I seriously doubt I will). - Then too, there's the matter of the truck and that I'd like some geraniums for the front of the house. - I' thinking: I MIGHT just get all the flowers and such together this year and then.. drop dead. Well? I DID “come home to die” and so, here I am. - Geraniums? Walmarde, Ticonderoga. How to get there with-out having to drive over all those hills and turns. The only way I know of is up to E-Town and across and down. Many miles, but not so mountainous. I don't know. And I probably won't be able to afford any even if the truck runs the route... which I doubt as well. Oh, it's just “one of those down days” I suppose. We'll see what “tomorrow” brings... I have to get into town then. (And there's over 200$ on FS. How nice it would be to be able to actually GET that much in food... fuck.) - Any-way, time to begin “meal”... what'ever that might be. - 20.04 Meal of meat-loaf and the rest of the “stew veggies”, followed by fresh-baked cookies is done. Started at 17.10... washing-up done by 17.45. No matter how I try to “take my time”... that's the time it takes. Watched “some” news during but as soon as meal was done, so too was the news. I just have no patience for the ignorance and stupidity any more. - Am off of “Minds”. Can't stomach the bull-shit there any longer either. - A few text messages to/from Theresa. I'm tired tonight... just tired of it all. - Now? Getting ready for bed. Have to check the “tea tree oil bandage”. If it's coming off I'll have to replace it. If not... straight to bed. Mostly for “escape”. I'm just at wits' end tonight. - Tomorrow? MUST get to Richie to get my keys for the Pee-Oh box. Butter's on sale but limit of 1. Fuck. Oh well... One's better than none and no doubt, I'll be back during the week any-way. (Maybe the walking will do my breathing some good.) But it's supposed to RAIN again tomorrow. How charming. Alas. - Another day... gone. -
Mon.11.May: 5.27 And here I am... dressed, in from smoke, coffee at hand, the skies are overcast and turning a whiter shade of day. And why am I up and about? I doubt any-body could say. I doubt any-body could care. But here I am. And it's another “rather difficult” morning, breath-wise. But? Things to do later and such and so... here I am. - Odd note this morning: I was in bed by 20.30 last night, lights out by shortly after 21.00 and, for the most part, slept through, save one, I believe, trip to the loo at some point. But just before drifting to sleep, I had this “sensation” of “being drawn away from here”... I felt as if I were leaving the house. The truck seemed to dissolve, I was just being “removed” from the house and New Russia. I wasn't “going” any-where in particular... just “away”. And just now, sitting out on the front porch, I had the sensation that I'm not actually here. There's some part of some-thing missing, gone, away. I wonder... but not for long or for any other particular length of time now that it's been mentioned. - Other-wise, it's a rather “typical” morning of nose-blowing, clearing of chest and the rest of what constitutes a “morning”. Where it will all go is to be seen. - Pondering the toddle today. Not really necessary to go all the way into town at this juncture, and if the truck is road-worthy before week's end, I can get what I'd like and more later. Butter is the one thing, on sale. Other than that, nothing, really. Ice cream would be nice, but having the truck would make that much easier and better, since I could get it back sooner. So? Again... we'll see what comes. - Thinning the lilies is on my list, and perhaps, some kind of wood to “wrap” the plastic planters for the porch. I wanted to make a “Thank You” note for Suzie for the lifts into town and perhaps, something “artsy” for Theresa, for the contribution to the truck expenses and the yeast. - OH... THERE'S a little something... It was a semi-half-dream-of-sorts just before waking: I'd just done some baking and had just opened the oven door to see that the “risen” bread had “collapsed” and baked and was pale. Instead of a loaf in the little pan, the dough had collapsed, even shrunk, and was laying in the bottom of the pan, twisted about and fully baked to the point of almost solidification, and pale. Hmmm... interesting. And then the alarm sounded and I woke. - There. That's that for this morning. Now, on to coffee and... what-ever it is to follow. - 14.00 Well... the rains are here, they started as I started to dig to replace the soil at the corner of the porch. Oh well. But I DID get to Richie this morning to exchange the set of keys to the truck. Said he, the part arrived there this morning but I told him to take his time. He thanked me and said they'd probably get to it tomorrow. Hey... no rush. I'll be heading into town, if any-thing at all... and even that's not a guarantee. - Chatted lightly with Suzie who said that, if I'm going into town tomorrow, let her know and she'll run me there. That's nice. I might... I don't know for certain. - Chatted with Mr. Alvin when I asked about the whee-barrow. Not that I needed it. I used a bucket from the shed and the hand-cart. When I told him that I was thinning the lilies he said “Alden will appreciate all the work you're doing here.” It touched me to hear that, especially after all the Biddy Bull-shit. Sadly, I didn't get to them today. - BIGGEST NEWS: SPOKE WITH EV WHO SOUNDED VERY GOOD TODAY AND THANKED ME FOR BEING CONCERNED ABOUT HER. It was a delight to hear her voice. - Had tea and bread-and-butter and peanut-butter at about noon. - Am painting a piece of lumber from the garage for another loo shelf. - There's nothing I need to do today. And the last “below freeze” night isn't until Wednesday so.... - 21.21 Spoke with Donna. Spoke with Theresa. Now it's late and I want a shower. Time to ROLL along! Nothing on the “agenda” for tomorrow except lodge serious formal complaints against the local PO... my oils were sent to LEWIS today! The end... The folks are going DOWN. - But for now, last smoke, quick shower, to bed.
Tue.12.May: 4.51 Yes, indeed, woke at 4.00, looked at the clock, rolled over to “snooze” and had to pee. So I got up, pee'ed, went back to bed and couldn't go back to sleep. So, at 4.25, as the furnace kicked, I got up, put on the coffee, got dressed, have had first coffee and half-smoke and here we are... another day. Don't know why, but here I am. - In a bit, I'll go check the oil tank for the “before delivery” mark, want to take a photo of the South side of the house to decide where to thin the lilies and then... wait for the oil, wait to see if my “parcel” arrives today and then ring the Pee-Oh to lodge that complaint of mail tampering. - I'm not seeing any tomatoes sprouting yet. But tomorrow night is supposed to be -7° so again, no rush there. - Richie said they'd work on the truck today so there's nothing about that to be done. I'll take it into town when it's “done” (again) and go to market for dairy products and such. - Just in a “bleak” sort of mind-set this morning. Not tired. Just... “off”. Breathing's not “too bad”. And I've got head-ache for some reason. Oh well. What-ever. I'm typing. That's something... I suppose. - 5.00 THE RENT CHEQUE HAS CLEARED!!! AS OF YESTERDAY!!! GREATEST NEWS OF THE MONTH!!! THAT'S BEEN MY GREATEST STRESS!!! OK! Let's roll with the day! - 10.03 WELL!!! QUITE THE MORN. AT ABOUT 9.50... RICHIE PHONED TO SAY THE TRUCK IS READY (again)!!! “Brake cooler and tubings”... again!!! Then... my oils arrived today... 2 peppermint and a pine. AND... the sun is shining, the WIND is blowing and it's COLD out there! And today's EXPENSE? Almost 300$. HERE we go AGAIN! Nickle-and-dime... and another several thousands. - I asked Suzie if she could drop me at Richie's and she agreed. So... I'll take the “test drive” up to the market this morning. What I'll get is anybody's guess, considering they have nothing and I don't really NEED any-thing at the moment. BUT... ice cream? Perhaps. More meat? Perhaps. - And I've potted the herbs. And I snoozed for almost an hour before the Pee-Oh opened. So here we go... Another day rolls. - 14.01 BABY'S HOME! Suzie left the PO at almost noon. We chatted. She's been here from since only October... from Hollywood CA! Imagine! - Richie said the truck's a “keeper”, that the stuff that's being repaired is “routine maintenance” on a vehicle of it's age. The repairs were to the power steering cooler and fluids not the brakes. Imagine that. Another 305,09$. - BUT... the oil came today and it took only 160,5 gallons to FILL! 70,70$ LESS than I've paid... BUT NOW I have to deal with those morons about the extra. It COULD go toward the next propane... but I'm SURE they'll fuck it all to Hell some-how. - Meanwhile, saw Nancy at the market and WOW... she's just a pure delight! Told her about the truck. She says I should've brought the garbage to her anyway. What a MENSCH! - And now, having YOGHURT! I bought that and ice cream and juice and potatoes and butter!!! WOO-HOO! - Now to figure how to get to Walmarde? We shall see. - 18.19 Meal... chicken and BAKED POTATO WITH ICE CREAM after! All done. And out-side? SNOW down off the mountains. But... the lilies got thinned and transplanted round the garage. - The flower pots I want? Lowes... Plattsburgh! Now? Nope. Snow. Oh well... mayhaps tomorrow? Mayhaps. We shall see. - But I'm TIRED! Tired of the day, from the day, of the snow... and the cold. - Avery will apply the over-payment to the next propane delivery, scheduled for next week. Hopefully I'll owe only about 10$. - Other-wise... I'm tired. The washing-up is done and I think I might take a shower now and get to bed. Why not? Nothing else to do. - But BAKED POTATO with meal! WOOHOO! - 20.37 Hot shower. Nice scrub. New bandage under the arm. “Shelter sweats” and “Walmarde bootie slippers” on with the “house Sherpa”. Was on with Donna (she called back). - The snows stopped and the sun-set is AMAZING o'er the “white” mountains. “Atenne Bayern Schalger” on the “phone” and a v-ton at hand. Furnace was up and it's SO HOT in here now. Odd, how I can get so chilled but the minute the temperature reaches 70F, I'm schwitzing! “Old”. - Theresa's on a text binge. I think I might call... for an hour... NO MORE! I want to get to bed... I've got reading! - 23.44 Too long on the line with Theresa. Got cut again. Off to bed! Nothing on tomorrow's agenda... and the furnace is running. It's COLD! Says it's 3 but... it's colder than that. Anyway... off to last smoke and BED!
Wed.13.May: 9.16 Another “I regret that” morning, sort of. Didn't get out of bed until 7.30-ish... dragging only a touch, but not “too” bad. Not so much the v-ton as much as the entirely too late to bed hour! And I managed to read just a little before lights out... at about mid-night, since the phone was cut at about 23.00. Still... - Sun is shining. It's about 6° or so out there with a chilled breeze. Mr. Alvin's stacking the last of his fire-wood. I'll have the wheel-barrow soon? And I still have to “clean” the lilies a touch. - I see the Beefsteak tomatoes are starting, at long last, to sprout. Hope? Doubtful but... All these seeds were quite a waste as it seems I'll still have to get the plants for the marigolds and such... IF I can get to some-where AND there are any to be had by the time I get to where they might be. Alas, live and learn. - Have been making a list of items I'd LIKE to get: repair the little cellar shed, a front screen door, screens for the windows... &c. And it appears I've little choice in the matter of heading up to Plattsburgh for most. Silly, really, that I don't want to go up there. It's only about 10 miles more than Ticonderoga AND, to be honest, the drive is less strenuous on the truck. But... that's just me. Wise would be to wait until after Friday, to see what other bull-shit will be pulled concerning stores, shopping, masks, “distancing” and all the rest. Oh well. - Meanwhile, finishing coffee and pondering the “filling of the day”. It's another one of those “Oh, just go back to bed” sort of mornings but... we shall see what we shall see as the day rolls on and on and on.... - 10.40 Don't ask why... There are 7 sunflowers individually potted in frosting containers and another “couple” marigolds in another, as well. When the mood strikes... - No post today. - The sun is still shining, but tonight is -7° so no planting. - I'm tired. Nothing “new” there. And the furnace is running. It's annoying. - Coffee items are washed. And it was all with-in about an hour or just a little longer. Nothing like stuffing a day into an hour and then wondering what else to do. The truck is there and running, but there's no place I truly “want” or “need” to go to... unless I want to make another attempt at the market, which I do not. So? So here we are... indeed... we are. - 21.36 Just out of the shower because I CLEANED THE LILIES TODAY! AND raked the bit of salt-burnt grass along Simonds Hill. Got to that mound in the back too. But it looks much cleaner on the South side of the house now. AND... as I worked, Nancy stopped by en route into town... We chatted. She asked “Do you drink alcohol?” AND said she'd invite me to dinner with her and Paul one of these evenings, now that it's getting warmer! Imagine? A tentative invite to dine with a local! I'm amazed, and, of course, most honoured. It's made my 10 months here. AND THEN, got talking with Hannah who told quite the tale of what Becky's been pulling with them, telling her that their address is 6690 and NOT 5 Simonds Hill AND directing her to all sorts of incorrect mail shit. So... I'm NOT alone and I told her that I'm going to report the E-Town Pee-Oh any-way because of my misdirected and returned mail. Another point of “comfort”. It's NOT just ME... and my “negative attitude” and such. - AND... with this “covid” bull-shit, Hannah says we're “opening” on Friday... which means getting back to the way life should be (or close to it)... IF the divine idiot in Albany doesn't come up with more bull-shit to keep us fucked. - I'd like to try the trip to Plattsburgh for lumber, a door, the flower pots, flowers for the place. But I think I ought to wait until Friday... no “masks” and general fuckery. We shall see. Maybe I'll try tomorrow. But there's no “promises” - Meanwhile, watching “Graham Norton” this evening, Cindy Lauper was on. MY how she's aged. And Annie Lennox was on... and said it was just shortly before her 60th birthday. Anyway... Cindy sang a song from a play she was in, “Kinky Boots”... “I'm Not My Father's Son”. WOW! I now have it on the lap-top with lyrics and posted to the Minds Author channel... pinned. Amazing. It's been replaying since I found it. Quite moving... VERY close to “home”... and “heart”... not to mention the soul. - And so, “meal” was cold chicken and potato and ice cream. - It was a lovely day and tonight's supposed to be the last of the bitter nights. Planting time! There are 5 tomato cages in the garden. Sunflowers are almost ready to plant, more marigolds growing, the Beefsteak tomatoes have begun sprouting. Now to hope for no more snow and freezing! We shall see what comes of it all... I'm really looking forward to the flowers though. - On that... it's time to get to bed. I'm leaving the skin tag open to the air tonight. My arm-pit is a bit raw from the bandage chafing. Give the skin a rest. - Off to reading and hopefully, sleep. - (My fingers have been cramping some-thing AWFUL this evening... all twisted and such. I can't figure why, but I'm hoping for a painless, restful sleep through the night... “hoping”... stupid me.)
Not My Father's Son
Cindy Lauper
When I was just a kid
everything I did, was to be like him
under my skin
My father always thought,
if I was strong and fought
not like some albatross, I'd begin
to fit in
Look at me powerless and holding my breath
trying hard to repress what scared him to death
It was never easy to be his type of man
to breathe freely was not in his plan
and the best part of me
is what he wouldn't see
I'm not my fathers son
I'm not the image of what he dreamed of
With the strength of Sparta and the patience of Job,
still couldn't be the one
to echo what he'd done
and mirror what was not in me
So I jumped in my dreams and found an escape
maybe I went to extremes of leather and lace,
but the world seemed brighter six inches off the ground
and the air seemed lighter
I was profound and I felt so proud
just to live out loud<
br />
I'm not my fathers son
I'm not the image of what he dreamed of
With the strength of Sparta and the patience of Job,
still couldn't be the one
to echo what he'd done
and mirror what was not in me
The endless torrent of expectations swirling around my mind
gave way to the brightest currents of indignation
till I finally drew the line
(wore me down
I came to a realization and I finally turned around)
to see
that I could just be me
I'm not my fathers son
I'm not the image of what he dreamed of
With the strength of Sparta and the patience of Job,
still couldn't be the one
to echo what he'd done
and mirror what was not in me...
We're the same, Charlie boy,
you and me.
21.52 TO BED!
Thu.14.May: (19.37 ***** HUMMING BIRD AT THE FEEDER!!! ***** ) 5.44 It wasn't a “pain-free” night... right leg “jabs”... not the usual muscle spasms, but “jabs” of pain. Lights went out at about 22.00, maybe just before, but at mid-night and again at 2.00, the “jabs” woke me. Thankfully, I didn't have to get up and went back to sleep, but sleep was not undisturbed. Oh well... I managed to wake just before the 5.00 alarm and was out of bed at 5.10. - Right now, there's a “pain” in the centre of the chest. Hopefully it's the vitamins. If not, then... not. - In from smoke. Chilly morn with clear skies. And as much as I'd like to get on the road and get the flowers to make the house “pretty”... tomorrow is when the state “opens”, so there's really no sense in even trying. Of course, tomorrow, no doubt, the throngs will descend, en masse, and there'll be NO merchandise. But... we shall do what we do when we do it and that's all there is to that. Perhaps I'll run the truck down to the river to get plant water, stop at Paul and Nancy's, leave my phone number. Maybe a trip into the market for something. We shall see. - 11.57 Egg-shells in the garden, up-stairs window measured, so too, the other windows for screens, the front door, the cellar shed... Now? Chest pains and fatigue. Tea poured. I need a snooze. - 19.37 Well? It turned out to be be quite a rather “day”. I DID take that snooze, for about 30 minutes and when I woke, decided to have “tea”... bread and butter. After which... TOOK THE TRUCK INTO TOWN to Aubuchon's for potting soil, a regular bird feeder (12$ and of fucking course, made in Winkieland), bird seed and a bracket to hang the humming-bird feeder directly over the Southern set of living-room windows. When I got back, I put one bag of potting soil into the planters and moved them to the front porch. Next up, the bracket for the humming-bird feeder and then the other bird feeder. VERY NICE, indeed! I also took that fucking flag-pole hood-thing off the pole. I was going to “return” it but decided not to, lest it re-appear on the porch. WHAT a day. - “Meal” at 17.15... chicken breast and baked potato, ice cream after. And of course, by 18.00... washing-up was done. - Oh... found an old wooden barrel up-stairs and brought it down. The “terra cotta heater” is on it, in the living-room... rather like the “old days” at 5199. Nice. - Hoovered after meal.... and SHAME! The bag was literally STUFFED with shit! Truly... a SHAME on me! So It's now emptied. - OK... so I was just sitting on the porch, enjoying the rather warm air, watching the skies cloud a touch and when I came in, I got the scissors and cut that little bit of weather-stripping from under the front door that I've ignored (neglected) all along. As I was bent over snipping, I heard a DRONING noise. Peeking out the front door... A HUMMING-BIRD AT THE FEEDER!!! IT'S BEEN DISCOVERED!!! I couldn't be happier! And now, it's closer to the house so, if it's raining terribly, they can STILL come in to eat AND rest on the porch! - And as an aside: as I was working out back this after-noon, Nancy came to get her mail so I gave her my numbers. Says she, she' going to see if “Father Somebody” will like to be there for dinner... on Sunday and I'll be invited! I'll have to get some wine or something... in case. Imagine? Me? Invited to dine at the neighbour's? I can't imagine. - Speaking with Julius earlier, I mentioned being here 10 months this month. He said it seems more like I've been here a LOT longer. Indeed... I'm “in” in town. - So now, my arm-pit is itching like mad. I'm rather tired. Have been having the worst leg JABS this evening... even just standing. Have taken some apple cidre vinagre (from QC) to see if it helps. Will take a Robax (or what-ever it is) before bed... or a naproxen. Nothing really on the agenda for tomorrow, save, perhaps, making some sort of “boxes” for the planters on the porch to cover the tacky plastic. (Even Nancy was saying “Memorial Day” is planting so I just need to be patient.) - Looking forward to getting to bed soon. - And that's today. The BEST of it all is that the hummie found the FOOD! YAY!
Fri.15.May: (Hair-cut) 8.22 Horrid night, last night. Had a quick shower, into bed by about 21.30. A little reading. Lights out by 22.00... BAM! RIGHT LEG JABS AT 23.00! HAD to get up, put on the sweat pants and back brace. Finally, back to bed... 1.00 this morning... BAM! RIGHT AND LEFT LEG JABS! UP again, walk around. The WORST bit about these JABS is that I can barely stand when they strike! Had it not been for the clench-guard, I'd've most likely been YELLING from the pain. But I bit down hard and groaned. And so, I was still up at 2.00! FINALLY... fell asleep. In my sleep, I heard the 5.00 alarm but didn't come out of sleep, I was so exhausted. But then, for the 8.00 alarm, I did FORCE my-self to wake. Now, my arm-pit itches something absolutely miserably! No bandage on it through the night and the only time it doesn't itch is when my arm is raised. Were it not for the fact that the tea tree oil is actually working, the skin tag is drying up, I wouldn't bother with it any more. But I've started and I'm not stopping until that thing is GONE! So I've put another bandage on this morning... and the itching is miserable. - So much for “morning whine”. - The skies are quite over-cast but the air is definitely warmer that it's been in quite a while. I'm having second coffee, dressed, in from a smoke on the porch. Trying to figure what to “do” with today. Once upon a time, I'd've been in the truck and en route to Lowes. Not so this morning. It's the “trust” in the truck. With this “flu shit”, I don't know whether or not I'd be able to ride back with the truck, and, being in Plattsburgh... that's some 45 miles, give or take. THAT is a HELL of a walk, and these days, folks are REALLY less likely to give a lift. 4,5 miles takes 1,5 hours to walk.. not to mention I'd have “stuff”... that could be towed to Richie but... Oh well... and planting in the garden... well... Greene Mountain looks a touch on the “frosted” side this morning. It's warm down here but up there is a different story. Another 10 days til “Memorial Day”... Patience, I suppose. - Alas... - And I'm a bit “off and away” this morning. Probably because of the Robax? And the lack of sleep? And the general anxieties of a morning? And... any other excuse will do. A touch of head-ache as well. - What I think I'll do is, wait until the shits have left the PO today, grab a couple of boards and make “boxes” for the front porch. Fuck up the house again, and put more saw dust into the Hoover. What-ever. We shall see. As time runs, it'll soon be 16.00, time to prep “meal” and another day will have passed. That's the way it goes. For now? Coffee... and just roll with the time. - 20.48 WELL! HUMMIE CAME BACK AGAIN THIS EVENING! I'M SO THRILLED! AND... I'm just out of another shower following QUITE the hair-cut! Buzzed it right down tonight, and trimmed the beard as well. It feels cleaner (but I LOOK atrocious). I look SO OLD, DRAWN, so many “spots” on the fore-head. Really rather disgusting. I've NEVER liked those brown spots on the face. But, I know now, that they come from many years of hard work in the beating Summer sun. I've rather “earned” (or “deserved”) them, I suppose. Any-way... hairs are cut and I'm a bit more “human” again. This one was the “best” in a great many years. I took my time with it. (Sadly, in addition to the drawn, spotty face, my eyes are going too. Oh well... what next? Eh?) - Planted 2 strawberries in the terra cotta “plumbing” and put it on the porch. The planters are out there too. Little by little it's coming together. One strawberry is in a little pot for in-doors. I took them out of the “Post Office” planter and will put that back into the shed... let there be no “talk”. Fukkem. - Tomorrow's agenda is to plant some seeds in the garden. We were supposed to get thunder storms tonight so I didn't want seeds washed all over the place. Didn't really get the storms, and the mountains are all “misty” now. So tomorrow... instead of “driving about”, I'll plant. - My arm-pit is SO ITCHY tonight! It's like little pins. Between that and the “leg jabs” it looks to be an “interesting” night to come. - I took a naproxen before hair-cut and just put some vodka into the cranberry juice I'd poured before it all. I don't know what to do about the itch though. Probably shouldn't put powder on it but will leave it “open to the air” tonight... unless I MUST put a bandage on it for some reason. - Anyway... the day is done... as I knew it would be when it began. - I've got a considerable shopping list for Lowes when I get there. I'm thinking Sunday... perhaps early morning. Cabot butter is on coupon this week so I might rush to get one in the morning then head on up to Plattsburgh. Money I shouldn't spend but it's things for the house here. Hey... the nicer I make it, the more I “add”, perhaps the less likely a rent increase will come? (I wouldn't plan on it.) - Was tempted to phone Theresa but... She's been texting about her jade plant today. I just don't want to get into a chat that might go into mid-night. So? So... perhaps a bit of soc.med. and then to bed and HOPEFULLY to SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT! (I'm putting no wagers on it.) - 23.08 and a v-ton after the v-cran and a lot of soc.med. and I'm off to bed! At least the itching arm-pit has subsided. - Nothing on the agenda except planting for tomorrow... Sleep-in? Let's see.
Sat.16.May: 7.45 And another day has managed to wrangle its way in. 10°. “Nuageux avec éclairies”, they say and indeed, it rather is, with winds and such AND MR. HUMMIE to say “Bonjour!” as I had my smoke on the porch! (I'm so thrilled.) I'm dressed, at table, having coffee whilst the lavage soaks in the basins. Other than that much, I don't see much else in today's forecast of “accomplishments”. I might, at some point, grab some boards and make boxes for the front... or I might not. I might go to the garden and plant the seed-crops... or I might not. I HOPE there's no invite to dine for Sunday... I have nothing to bring AND I'd like to get to Plattsburgh for stuff, especially since there's quite a bit of rain in the forecast for Monday and having seeds in would be delightful at that point. We shall see.... as indeed, we usually do. - Last night? To the best of recollection, I did manage to sleep through. Woke at exactly 7.00 this morning too. - Arm-pit is still quite itchy this morning. I think I'll let it “settle” and “dry” today and then recommence the “treatment” later. - But for now... now is now and then is then and later is later and the day will have passed and all will be as it was. That's that. - 9.50 Lavage is done and hanging... some on the porch, some in the shower. - AND MY LITTLE GUY IS BACK... WHEN I GO TO THE PORCH FOR A SMOKE, HE COMES BY, HOVERS AS IF TO SAY “HI!”, HAS A BIT TO DRINK/EAT, AND GOES OFF ON HIS WAY. SUCH IS MY JOY. I HAVE TO SMILE. HE'S MY BRIGHTEST SPOT IN LIFE. - And now? Not sure what to do with the rest of this day. Planting? It's a touch too cool, I should think. I don't want to repeat the error made that one year when, at 5199, seeds went in and then had to be re-planted in June. I ain't even half as dumb as advertised. Oh well... Patience. - 20.05 Anther day comes to a close but THE HUMMIE FEEDER HAS BEEN BUSY THIS EVENING. TWO OF THEM ARE BACK! YAY! AND THEY COME FOR DINNER AT ABOUT 17.00! IMAGINE THAT! BUT *** TWO *** OF THEM AGAIN! I'M RELIEVED! AND SO HAPPY! - And, today, I raked the garden and PUT IN SEEDS FOR BEEFSTEAK TOMATOES AND BEETS! ALSO, THE REST OF THE BURPEE MARIGOLDS AT THE EDGES. WE SHALL SEE HOW THIS ALL WORKS OUT. - And then came meal of chicken, baked potato and frosting for “after”. - Quiet sort of day too. No complaints. - Now to see how tomorrow works out. The screens I want to make for the Southern windows are coming to a cost higher than I'd expected but then, my brain works on prices of 20 years ago. We shall see how that turns out when I get to Lowes. - Right now, pondering the briefest of showers and off to bed. Sad, really... Saturday night and off to bed at 20.30. I've become OLD. But it's of no matter.
Sun.17.May: 3.27 After about 6 hours of half-sleep ALL night. And DREAMS... DISTURBING DREAMS. I got up and out of bed at 3.06 and now, dressed and in from a smoke in the cool morning air... coffee at hand... here we go. - But as for the DREAMS:
The part(s) I recall... I was laying in bed, here, in this house, in my bed here, when I heard the sounds of some-body talking out-side the bed-room window. Men. Then then sounds of large trucks, some sort of “construction” going on. It was extremely early in the morning, the sun hadn't risen yet, and there they were, out there, chatting away, trucks moving about. The sound of somebody moving along from the front of the house to the back, along the Simonds Hill side, unrolling packing tape or a tape of that sort. That distinctive “cracking” sound of tape from a roll. I was annoyed, first, because it was early and they were making noise out-side the bed-room window and secondly, because there was construction going on and there was not advance notice of it! Angry, I got up, went to the kitchen and looked out at the drive. They were digging holes... along the North drive, by the garden! I went back into the bed-room and suddenly realised that that the trucks were by the garage! MY TRUCK! THEY WERE EXCAVATING BY THE TRUCK AND NEVER GAVE ME NOTICE TO MOVE IT! NOW I WAS PISSED-OFF WAY BEYOND SIMPLE ANGER! Quote suddenly, I was in another room in another house. It was dark. A short, curly-haired woman came into the room and started stripping the bed... MY BED! “What are you doing here?” I snapped at her. “I've got an early day off today and I'm gonna get all done that I can.” she replied, curtly and rather disrespectfully. She was some kind of house-keeper. And she went on about her business. My guts were at a boiling-point now. I headed down the hall-way toward the living-room and heard the sound of a washing machine running. A stop and look in the loo, sure enough, there was a washing machine running. I had NO idea how that got there. After all, it was “my house” and the machine wasn't mine! I stepped back into the hall and in the living-room... JACQUIE! Though it was Jacquie with very long, thick, red hair. She'd come in early from work and was wandering about, tossing her work-things about, almost oblivious of my presence. On a chair, a young girl who I knew to be her daughter. Same red hair, she sat there, with the visage of some pompous bitch, looking annoyed. I detected the annoyance was because of my presence. “You COULD have let me know that there was going to be some kind of construction going on today, y'know!” I said, rather rudely. And then I realised that I had to be more “polite” to her since it was HER house and that I was just there as some sort of “employee” AND that her daughter was now in the house and could make life extremely difficult for me up to tossing me at the very moment. Jacquie didn't bother to even reply, she just continued chatting with daughter and going on about her own affairs of tossing her work-things, bags and such, they'd been shopping as well, about the place. She did, how-ever, shoot a grimmaced glance toward me, with-out stopping. I thought “I REALLY NEED to get the fuck out of here... NOW!” and in my mind, I knew that I had another place to go to, here, in this house, but for some reason, there was some-thing prohibiting me from coming back to “MY” house at that particular point in time. - I woke out of that at about 2.10 and laid in bed pondering what to do with the day and whether or not to get up.
As for the rest of the “night”... lights were out at about 22.00 last night after some reading. I'd taken a naproxen for the leg-jabs, read a bit but wasn't tired when I put the lights out. I must have dozed, or snoozed for some time and woke again at about 23.30... looked at the clock, rolled over, “drifted” again... until about 0.45. Woke again, looked at the clock, pulled the covers up, got comfy and “drifted”... 1.24, awake again... that's when I dozed and had that dream. But all through, I never really got to “sleep”... all through the night. Can't figure why. Perhaps the anxieties of the possible road-trip today? Well... that's been shoved off. Especially having no proper sleep. I'm NOT going to Plattsburgh with any sort of fatigue! Just in case some-thing “new” goes wrong with the truck. So it appears I'll just head to town, grab butter, ice cream, meat of some kind, perhaps some sort of veggie. When I get back, I'll grab some boards from the garage and make the boxes for the flowers on the porch, paint them white with what I've got and push the Plattsburgh trip to tomorrow... or there about. This is going to be some kind of day... I'm not exactly exhausted at the moment, but oddly enough, just now, I'm a bit light-headed, “spinny”, as it were. Hmmmm... All else is as it usually is in the morning. But being awake at 3.54, there isn't much I can get to yet. I'll find some-thing to pass the time. Market doesn't open until 7.00 and, as I've learnt from Hanna, the “sales” prices don't always set-in until about 8.00 so... there's time... to fill... with some-thing. - What a day... - 10.02 Just back from market... DROVE... imagine that. And of course, am in a sour mood now... the “covidiots” are still demanding face cover. Fuktardz. BUT I GOT YEAST! There was YEAST in the market! AND butter. AND ice cream. AND SOME (but not much) chicken thighs. So I'm ready to bake more bread... and this time, with a bit of half'n'half for what-ever reason. - It's been a slow morning other-wise. I actually slept on the futon for about 90 minutes before getting up and on the road. It didn't do much in the way of being “rested” but... - 10.43 Time to get a move on here. I'm waiting to see if the “Mayors” will be leaving any time soon so I can get some boards from the garage. Will put the spinach, beans and potatoes in today and hope they don't get too cold. Have to put-up the chicken from this morning too. Just some “things” to keep busy... pass the time... instead of going back to bed. - Was “texting” with Theresa for a bit too. Ah... Sunday morning. - 22.24 WELL!!!! Can't say that this was a “wasted” day... I managed to plant ALL of the “kitchen” garden, including the potatoes, then moved on to going across to Cliff (who's back and wearing a mask because he got “tested” in PA for the “flu” and came up negative and is being EXTRA “cautious”... no comment) to get more fencing and re-did the back garden, then (I'm going to do notes... I've had a v-ton and some hours with Theresa... which ended when the Samsung cut us off and the phone went berserk! Cut us off, switched to “camera”, little icons flashing, wouldn't power-down. Quite strange! I did, finally, get it to shut off. I wonder what's up with THAT now. But... - Let me list the day's events, because it was quite the “busy”:
Got to market this morning at about 9.30-ish. Parked at market, walked up to Aubuchon's to see their “left-over florals and veg”. Sad, really. And annoying. They COULD and, I believe OUGHT to offer more. But who am I to think such a thing? Eh? Really. Just sad. At market, the meat and poultry offerings were the usual disgusting, but I did get a package of thighs. Ice cream was BOGO, so I did, along with butter (on sale), yoghurt, and the afore-mentioned YEAST, and more eggs and such. So it wasn't a complete waste. At least I got some ice-cream!
Back at the “home”... I decided to PLANT THE KITCHEN GARDEN, beans, spinach and potatoes. ALL is in there now... except the tomato seedlings which I'll hold until week-end when the night temperatures should stop being single-digit.
Not sure why, but decided to re-establish the back garden as well. So I toddled over to Cliff to see about another length of 4ft fencing. He answered my knock and put a mask on before opening the door. Yes, indeed, there was more fencing to be had but as for the mask, he said that he'd been “tested” for this “flu” and it turned-out “negative” so he's “playing it safe”. Honestly! This in New Russia. We don't tend to travel about, and the “influx of tourists” really hasn't hit us, so... maybe it's best he does keep his own “quarantine” and “social distance” from the rest of us. If ANY-body is to bring shit in... he's come from PA now... so be it. So with a roll of fencing, I and the fence, rolled across the road and to the back where I put 2 posts back in and set the fencing. (Potatoes have been planted in there with the onions and strawberries.)
Chatted with Vivian again, today, as she worked the “Peace Garden”. She was quite jovial, and, my main point is that, when I mentioned hoping Alden won't decided to sell this place off, she replied “Oh, he won't sell as long as he's got renters, especially people who care for the place.” She tells of tenants who used the bare walls as dart boards in the past. Indeed... I'm doing yard-work, the folks next door want to paint. This place is almost “self-maintenance”. One would be hard-pressed to find better “tenants”. “Time” alone, will tell.
Well the gardens occupied most of the day, but it wasn't done. No. To the garage, grabbed 2 planks, brought them to the front porch and gave them 2 coats of primer, marked them off. ALL THE WHILE AS I PAINTED, THE HUMMIES BUZZED OVER-HEAD! SO SO TOO CUTE-SUCH FUN! IT'S SUCH A DELIGHT TO HAVE THEM BACK AGAIN! It was about 15.00 or there-by when Julius came rolling in. I was just getting ready to cut the planks. Asked if “they” were going to nap or any-thing so as not to disturb. He assured me that they weren't and so... CUTTING COMMENCED! Got the parts cut, screwed things together and... by about 16.45...had them out on the porch. They're not “complete”... needed a bit of a painting, but they look OK. Oddly though, and sadly, from across the road, they make the “sag-and-drop” of the porch more visible, but I'm not paying it any mind. They are what they are: there.
AS I was “finishing” the cleaning of the day's mess in the house, I put together a veggie fritatta for meal, with the left-over, cold chicken and, by about 17.15 or so, was seated at table to devour. It was quite a bit of food but necessary after all today's “activities”. Ice cream followed.
Now, a bit of a note: My fingers go into spasm when I have ice cream. Not sure why it happens thus, but it does. Painful too. I'm thinking though, that it has some-thing to do with the “ulnar” nerve in the arms and the position of my elbows as I eat. I don't know and don't really intend on putting any particular thought into it.
AT LONG LAST... 18.20 and the day was DONE! Kitchen tidied, Hoovering done... time to “relax”. So out to the porch for a smoke and... NANCY PULLED UP! WITH 2 PLATES! Said she'd left my number at some-body's home, tried to “information” but I'm not listed (of course not... and even if so, she'd get the non-ringing land-line). But SHE BROUGHT A PLATE WITH BEANS, A FRANK IN A BUN WITH TOPPING, POTATO SALAD AND SOME SORT OF ONIONS-WITH-CHEESE... AND 2 SLICES OF BUNT CAKE! Says we'll get together during the week. QUITE amazing but....
She inspired me to get into the truck, go to the river for plant water... and to drop another “note” with my numbers, at her place and so.... off I went. When I got to her place, “all” were assembled in the yard. She invited me to stay for a drink but I declined, politely. Told her that I was out to get the water. She suggested going up to the “spring” up the road. Apparently, it's potable water! But I told her of my plants, she told me she has a lemon tree and all was settled. (I had to BACK down out of her drive though... talk about “good driver”.) DID get to the river for some water but will have to go back soon... this has got sediment in. But it's better than nothing.
Back at the house, finished the tidying, rang Theresa just to chat... and there went the day! Seriously. Chitting, chatting, yammering, gabbing, talking, discussing... until the phone went mad. But anyway, another day has passed and now it's off to a quick shower and HOPEFULLY TO FUCKING SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT! I'M DAMNED-EXHAUSTED... but in the very best fashion. Successfully managed to “occupy” yet, another day.
AND IT WAS QUITE A “BUSY” DAY WITH THE HUMMIES
Mon.18.May: 7.24 Up from since about 6.00 (5.45 more likely). Heard the 5.00 alarm, turned it off and went back to snooze until the next alarm. Got up, don't know why, exactly, usual morning routine and when dressed, had coffee, checked some e-mail and texts, responded to Theresa with last night's “event” (from the loo). And, have moved the Cypress vines to the front porch (with an additional 10 seeds per, just to see what will come of them). Watered the boxes and... am actually waiting to see what the “results” of the “Nancy plates” will be this morning before making any decisions on what to do with the rest of this day. - It's raining. Been raining. Forecast is for sun and warmth. We shall see. Indeed. The rains are grand, after seeding the kitchen garden yesterday. Will hold the seedlings until later in the week as night temps are forecast in the single-digits through the week to come. - Would like to go back to bed... or to futon... or... just go... but that too, is to be seen. - Need to “fill in” yesterday's events from notes and memory and then... perhaps Plattsburgh. Perhaps not. We'll know then the day is done. I'm in no particular rush... none at all. - 8.01 and yesterday's particulars are noted, the rains seem to have come to a pause... and I'm tired! Another smoke and... off to snooze. - OH... by the way... ONE CENTRE WINDOW IN THE LIVING-ROOM WAS OPENED ALL NIGHT LAST NIGHT... AND IT WAS PERFECTLY COMFY THIS MORNING. OH... HERE COMES THE HEAT-WAVES? I DOUBT IT, BUT IT DOES TELL THAT IT'S TIME TO SERIOUSLY GET SCREENS MADE AND UP AND IN! - 13.08 Stomach in turmoil... but here we go! - 19.14!!!!! FIVE AND A HALF HOURS!!!!! SHOPPING AND HATING JUST ABOUT EVERY MOMENT OF IT! BUT... GO THE SCREEN DOOR... AND IT NEEDS A “SHAVE”! FUCK. - BUT... RIGHT NOW... FRITATTA-TIME (and a v-ton after to be sure). - 22.29 Well? The ORANGE and the AVOCADO trees are in their NEW pots with FRESH “potting” soil and river water now. JUST finished! - Meal was late, eaten quickly because I was hungry, and to be honest, not really at all good. But it was what it was: veggie fritatta with the left-over chicken followed by ice cream. And immediately after, I started on the re-potting but got interrupted right after the orange tree. DONNA RANG! So I was THRILLED. We chatted a while. “I had to check to make sure you were still alive. You got your truck back on the road and you're gone!” she said. But I told her of the day and we chatted about today, current state of insanity, and about the “old days” and we had some great laughs. - Whislt on with Donna, texts... Theresa's in ER. She was washing a coffee press and it broke! Cut her finger! She's gotten 5 stitches. How I remember doing that washing one of Zuri's wine glasses, back in the “3rd Ave” days. - Anyway, when Donna and I finished our chat, I re-potted the avocado. Now, there are marigolds and geraniums and some kind of other red flowers to be put out around the house. I really did over-do the flowers money though. They're expensive! Which reminds me... I have to do the balance sheet. - OH... AND THE NYSEG BILL CAME TODAY... WITH THE BALANCE OF THE “BUDGET”... 290$!!! “Due upon receipt” of course. I'd gotten it before leaving to go shopping. It's at a point where yes, this is going to be tighter than HELL, come next Wednesday when I “bill pay”, but, the stuff I got today I wanted and I've earned it all. So at any rate, I'll be “occupied” for a while... at least a day or two. - Right now, I think I'll have a beverage... take a quick shower... “Avery” should be coming tomorrow... another bill on the way. Oh well... - 23.42 Having a beverage, having done the “damage report”. At least I can still pay the electric bill and have some left over. THAT'S a relief! - Theresa is going to bed and I will do like-wise in short order. But I NEEDED the drink tonight. (Now, to see if I can manage a quick shower after this. I NEED one of those too.)
Tue.19.May: 7.58 Just got up and went to bed at 0.52 this morning and indeed, yes, slept through. I don't even recall having heard the 5.00 alarm... and at about 7.30-ish, woke of my own accord and am now dressed, in from smoke, coffee on the steep as the sun shines bright o'er my old Adirondack home where I sit, in a quandary over what to get to first today. The front door needs to be shaved, then painted, then hung. Flowers need to be planted in boxes and on the side of the house. Screens need to be made for the bed-room windows (first, then the drawing room... and I'm seriously doubting that I'll have enough of those “kits” for all windows but...). I need another handle for the inside of the front door... a trip to some-where... probably Wal-fucking-marde, Ticonderoga? The back yard needs more “cleaning”. I'm not sure about doing the front door in black... or white or red or... and that means another trip for paint if not black. I'd like to drop into town for more butter and ice cream. I need to get something together for meal this evening. Gardens should be attended. I just don't know where to begin. Imagine THAT. - 9.11 (That hour never ceases to evoke...) Well, coffee's almost done, and morning “loo” is accomplished and all the parts of all the projects are still laying where they were tossed yesterday and it's the strangest situation but I'm actually “over-whelmed”... I'm so accustomed to “wanting to do” but not having the means that, sitting here with the means now, I can't get my mind to stop long enough to figure where to begin! So thoughts of what I didn't get yesterday keep bashing all incentive to actually pick-up something and commence! Imagine that! It's truly just annoying. (And I believe Ms. Suzie's just done the boxing of today's post already.) - And I'm chilly in here this morning. Oh well... eventually SOME thing will be done... I should only hope. - 12.40 *** AVERY CAME, FILLED THE PROPANE... COST SHOULD BE 58,21$ (if they credit on time with discount)... I HAD A CREDIT OF 70,70$ FROM THE OIL BILL, SO TODAY... *** NO BILL FOR AVERY!!! *** AND I SHOULD STILL HAVE A REMAINING CREDIT ON THE ACCOUNT FOR 12,49$!!! COLOUR ME: A-FUCKING-MAZED!!! - I tried to have a lie-down for a snooze, on the futon but Avery showed and that killed all hopes of that so the lie-down was about 25 minutes of no rest. I need to get busy with the window screens now... and the 3 kits are NOT going to cover 4 windows as I'd hoped. But, at least I can get the bed-room done... IF I get my shit together and get it done, which I MUST do... NOW. - There's no bread for today's tea and I don't feel like travelling. Oh well... - It's just one of “those” days. - OH... by the fucking way, Ms. Suzie said: “My friend Jessica put up a wind chime out here last week and it's gone. Do you know where it went? I thought maybe you took it down because it drove you crazy.” Me? I said that I hadn't noticed, that the last time there was one up there it was blown down AND I mentioned that I'm fed-up with the PO sticking shit on the space that *I* rent and pay for. Let's see where this rolls to... I expect a LOT of bull-shit to follow. - But, there are flowers on the porch. Now to get to the rest. (I'm really not in much of a mood, to be honest.) - 19.16 The flowers are in the boxes on the porch. TWO SCREENS ON THE BED-ROOM WINDOWS... TOOK ME ALMOST 4 FUCKING HOURS TO PUT THEM TOGETHER AND WHAT A PAIN IN THE ARSE THEY ARE... Cheap Chinese bull-shit. I need more “corners” to make the 4th for the drawing room windows but for now... I need to take the plastic off the bed-room windows and I can have AIR in there! (But not tonight, Josephine.) And, the “Dianthus” and marigolds are planted on the South side of the house. Tomorrow evening, I'll put the sun-flower seedlings in and THAT will, pretty much, take care of flowers. But certainly not bad for a morning that started out over-whelming. - And I got done with the screens JUST in time for “meal” at 17.00! I'd put it in the oven at about 15.45, as I was still working on the last screen. Timing was PERFECT! So I had 2 pieces of chicken, a baked potato, ice cream after... and it was after meal that I decided to put the flowers in along the house. So now... other than a few items about the living-room (for the next set of screens), and the floors needing a bit of cleaning... THAT has been my day! Next? The other 2 screens, then the front door, then plant seedlings in the garden and THEN? Clean the house and THEN? Probably drop dead or come down with some serious bull-shit illness so I can't actually ENJOY my little home in the Adirondacks. (Or... it'll wait until I've done in the back yard and THEN have it all snatched away.) - But for now... there's a shower in tonight's agenda, to be sure. I need one tonight. To be honest, I can't believe I accomplished as much as I did today. Hey, hey, HEY! - 22.14 Und... Ich bin schpritzt! UND, Ich trinke Wodka und Tonic. So there! - It's been a delightful day, all said and accounted for. The window screens, the flowers, a wonderful new Schlager tune on the iPod. A bit of “texting” with Theresa (who sent a photo of her finger and OUCH! It hurt ME... too many memories still “raw” in the mind. I can't help but think: she's got Lupus and a few other troubles. I HOPE she heals properly and quickly. I wish there was something I could DO for her and about it. I'm thinking what I would do for it... cocoa butter and the likes. - Other-wise, I'm looking toward tomorrow... more screens, a trip to Kinney's and the market. It would be nice if I could get the corners for the screen frames at Aubuchon's but I wouldn't count on it. AND... the DOOR! Planing and sanding and painting at the very least. - And today, the garden got watered. The warm nights are coming so I can put the sunflowers and the other marigolds out too! WOW! It's so nice to have... a “HOME” again! (If I could only get the Pee-Oh out... but that's too complicated and involved.) - So now? A little beverage and to bed! Read and schlaf! Ich hoffe. - (German... nice to be bringing it back into my life.) - Oh... Did I mention that Nancy rang this evening? She DID! Another “dinner” on the week-end since it's the “holiday” and all. And she was walking up by the spring and asked if I'd gotten up to it yet. When I thanked her for being so kind, I told her about my first months here, being Hell because of “rumours”. Her reply: “Karma.” and “I had no idea.” So, little by little it gets out and about. I told her that I'd looked for some other place to move to right away. She just said “People have no right to lie about other people. But Karma takes care of them.” So there. - And now... on to some soc.med. with v-ton and then to BED! Another day of “chores” coming... if I wake again for another one. - 24.31 DONE!
Wed.20.May: 8.19 The sky is perfectly clear out there, the temperature is only just ever-so slightly “chilled” but amazingly comfy. BOTH Hummies were “at the counter” this morning, doing breakfast, TOGETHER. Yesterday's flowers appear to be just fine. And after a RUDE wake-up at 2.00 this morning, with HORRIFIC LEG-JABS, necessitating the donning of the support belt... there was sleep... until 7.45. Enough sleep? No. Feeling a touch “under”, and not really because of the v-ton before bed. But I'm up, coffee's steeping, and I'm in from a smoke. There. Another day commences and this one's got a list already. Quick trip into town for some hard-wares, as it were. 2 more screens (hopefully) to be ass-embled and work on the front door. TOMORROW, if weather holds true... the seedlings go to the freedom of the great out-of-doors and... life moves on. - I can't help but think (repeatedly) that I've probably got another 4 years here until I go completely under. Indeed... I'll probably get it all nicely settled and then... “Good-bye, au revoir, auf wiedersehen, fare-well, ciao, sionara, fukkoff.” But-oh-well. In the mean-while, no sense in just sitting here waiting for it to arrive and then depart. Once again: Leave the place better than it was when you got here. Isn't that what “life” is all about? Hey! If Alden out-lives me, he'll have a very nice little place to rent or sell, a little some-place worth more than it was when first we met. - The gas and oil are paid. There's just enough to cover the electric and the loan payment this month and the phone/internet. And the registration and inspection on the truck. “Legal” and “responsible”. Can it be imagined? - Mother got what? 10 years of “good times” before all went to shit? Me? MAYBE I'll get 5 years. I'm not planning on it but... Chances are, I'll get a HELL OF A LOT LESS. But again... no sense in sitting and waiting for it. Kay Sarah-Sarah. - Let's just get on with it; shall we? Oh yes, let's shall. Fuck. - 10.47 THE BEDROOM WINDOWS ARE... *** OPEN *** A T LONG, LONG LAST! We've got another 2 nights of single-digits, but... there's AIR in the bed-room again! AND... the house is Hoovered. - Bad news? Nancy... Lib/Dem. Oh well. And she's originally from Port Henry. Imagine that. I ALMOST “resided” there. (Better here though... where there's rent being paid and the “legality” of “residence” is firmer.) Anyway, there's one less “item” on the “social agenda”. No “rush” to attend “functions up the hill”. - Now... I need to get me together and into town so I can come back and get to WORK! - Noting for the morning: “digestive disturbances” continue. The constant sensation of having to move the bowels. Hmpf. Always something. And breathing is a touch on the “annoying” side. But the temperatures are rising so, of course, there's trouble with breathing. One of these days.... no more troubles... no more breathing. One of these days. - And the Schlagersahne plays on. - Oh, and Nancy was at the PO this morning when I went out for back-porch smoke. Ms. Suzie needed help bringing in a chair she's bought for the office and I helped. (“Such a nice man”, as Ms. BiddyBecky once referred to me.) She's got mice in the ceiling over there. How charming. And she's put up a flower on the hook where the “chimes” used to be. Better that than “tinkle-shit”. - I've got to get me moving here. Coffee's done too. - 14.42 Back from town and a shopping run that covered ALL of what I actually set out for... not to mention... FREE CORNERS for the next screens! AND a Mag-lite AND a new wall mirror! 12 chicken thighs, cranberry juice, ice cream, cream cheese.... and smokes. I am AMAZED! - 19.55 (Teeheeheehee) Managed to make the two LAST screens, even made the last ONE AFTER meal (at 17.15... meal... done, of course, by 18.00) and went to install and... THEY'RE JUST A FRACTION TOO WIDE! FUCK ME! NOW... I have to take them apart, file the cross pieces down a bit and HOPE I can do this with-out cutting the SCREENING! OH... IT FUCKING FIGURES! BUT... at least the BED-ROOM window screens are in and the windows are OPEN TONIGHT! - And me? I'm exhausted and looking to a BEVERAGE! - I think I'll put the chicken up first though... or... maybe do both at the same time. What-ever. - Tomorrow... I'm working the DOOR! I'd LIKE to have it done for the week-end. But then again, there's (too) much I'd “like to have done”... soon. We shall see. As mother would say: “What's the hurry?” - I'M STILL ANNOYED: RECEIVED AN “INVOICE”, VIA E-MAIL, FROM AVERY TODAY AND RANG JUST TO BE SURE THE PAYMENT WAS CREDITED AND SURE ENOUGH, THE CUNT TRIED TO RUN THE DAMNED CARD! “Oh... the card was declined.” SAIID SHE. DAMNED GOOD THING! SO I TOLD HER ABOUT THE CREDIT ON MY ACCOUNT, HEARD HER DOING ALL SORTS OF BULL-SHIT AND THEN SHE SAID “I'LL TAKE CARE OF IT. YEAH? NOW I HAVE TO CALL BACK AGAIN... KEEPING UP WITH THEIR BOOK-FUCKING-KEEPING! TOMORROW... I CALL GORDON. I'M TIRED OF THIS BULL-SHIT. FUCKING MORONS, THAT LOT. - Time to move along. It's warm tonight and clear and I'm not in a proper mood. - 21.15 The chicken is put up... AND THE FUCKING CAP CAME OFF THE FUCKING PEPPER AGAIN SO THE CHICKEN IS GOING TO BE “PEPPERED”! And I'm having a “beverage”... and a naproxen. Let's see how tonight's sleep goes. Tomorrow... if my body co-operates, I shall do the door... then MAYBE the screens repairs and THEN... plant the seedlings in the evening hours since tomorrow night is supposed to be 10°. Ah... the Summer is RAPIDLY approaching the mountains. The thermometer on the porch read... 100° this evening. HERE WE GO! - Now... finish my beverage, soc.med. and bed! - There's a god-damned FLY in the house! All this screen-work... and a FLY! Oh well... It was a BEAUTIFUL day. - Have to add: I had to go out to get the rubber mallet from the truck this evening... for the fucking screens... looked into the back-yard, looked at the truck... and almost cried. HOW DID THIS HAPPEN? I'M ACTUALLY HERE... WHERE I ONCE ONLY DREAMT OF BEING. HOW? AND HOW BEAUTIFUL!
Thu.21.May: 5.28 (*GARDEN-PLANTING DAY!*)
SUCCESS! A complete SLEEP-THROUGH last night and yes, up at about 4.45... and waited for the alarm at 5.00 and now, coffee, dressed, smoke and the day commences... “another” day with much to be done. Paint the wood I chiselled-down last evening, file the screens and install, plane the screen door then paint it and maybe even get around to installing it. Then, if I'm still mobile this evening, plant the tomatoes, maybe some more beets and spinach in the back garden. I need to find time to bake some bread too. Indeed, a day FULL of “things”. “No hurry”? I shouldn't think so. But we shall see what comes of all of this when the day is done... tonight. We shall see. - It's a touch on the “chilled” side out there on this clear morn. John O. has been burning through the night and the stench is nasty, came in through the OPEN BED-ROOM window this morning. OPEN WINDOWS... imagine that! Oh well. - So now here's off and getting a move-along on. - 8.31 Coffee's done and... THE SCREENS ARE UP ON THE WINDOWS FOR THE “DRAWING-ROOM”! YES! I've cut the cross pieces AND installed them! (The Western screen isn't taught, but I DON'T GIVE A SHIT! I CAN OPEN THE WINDOWS NOW! AND... I managed to cut the bit of grass (with hand shears) at the South-East corner of the porch AND sweep the front of the house nice and neat.! Three morning hours and that much is DONE! Next? The front screen door (and I dread that). And a bit of planting later and... on to the next project (which might be to paint the drawing room but... we shall see how that all works along... right now it's about the door and nothing else... I want “my house” back together... with-out “parts” and tools laying all about). - (*FILL-IN AT FRIDAY MORNING AT 8.17*) SO... here we go trying to pull the old memory.... No “fucking about” this morning, there was WORK done on this old house, indeed, to be sure, indeed! The screens got put in, with quite a bit of effort and it was time to put the place back together in prep for the next item on the daily agenda... the screen door. I'm currently trying to put off cutting it because of the fear of either a “scallop” effect or a “diagonal cut” or worse... cutting it too short on the sides. But no prob with that today. I checked some measurements, width and... thankfully, the depth of the door. THAT proved to be QUITE and issue... the door's thicker than the recess on the frame! By about an inch! I can't hinge the door to the frame! So it was off to the garage again, in search of some sort of furring strips or... as it turned-out... MOULDING! AND a ripped strip of approximately 1x1inch wood! BINGO-PAY-DAY-EUREKA! AND JUST ENOUGH TO DO THE JOB OF FRAMING THE FRONT DOOR TOO! I am amazed... So I brought the wood in and started the measurements (carefully). - Next came...
THE KICKER... I happened to step out the front door as Jeff pulled into the drive (via the PO). He motioned to me to come over to the truck and as I walked over, he got out of the truck, walked round to the back, dropped the gate and said “I have some-thing here for you.” AND PULLED OUT A (re-built) LAWN MOWER! *AND* A 2-GAL CONTAINER OF GAS TO GO WITH!!! “I just got this as the guy was finishing working on it. It runs, the only thing you have to do is give it about 15 pumps (prime) before you start it but it works. You an Julius can fight over who gets to use it.” SERIOUSLY! JEFF BOUGHT A MOWER FOR THE HOUSE HERE! (OK... later on I was to learn that he got it for 40$ BUT... a MOWER AND THE GAS? WHAT KIND OF LIFE IT THIS HERE? LET'S NEVER MIND THAT I'VE BEEN WONDERING WHY HE'S NEVER STOPPED TO GIVE ME A LIFT TO/FROM TOWN ALL WINTER... BUT TO BRING A MOWER? AND THE GAS? YES... I AM IN A BIT OF A STATE OF SHOCK! (Although, I must admit, I can't help but think that it was/is more for the grand-son and girl-friend... still... it was “presented” to me... to ME... not just left in the yard or the likes. I tellya... this New Russia is... well... it IS!
OK... the mower went to the back yard because I was well under-way on the front door framing, which, I have to admit and mention, took a LOT MORE time than I'd expected... with a moment to stop for a “yoghurt break” (because I HAD to eat something), and the PO being closed and all things in town back to “normal”... I got to the cutting and the affixing and screwing and all the rest... including and not limited to, a few coats of white primer. It took, pretty much, the entire rest of the day. - Moving along... I grabbed the leaf rake and went after the yard, to get the stones out of the grass so as not to damage the mower. I'd put chicken and potatoes into the oven to cook whilst... Got the raking/cleaning done and a chat with Julius who said, when I mentioned the “fight over the mower” said that he'd said to Jeff that I'd probably enjoy mowing more than he would especially since he's at work most of the day any-way. (Truth is... I thought of it too... first of all, I might doubt that he even wants to be bollocksed with mowing, second, the fact it, he IS up and on the road by 6.00 and he and Hannah don't get back until 15-16.00 by which time I'm sure they're both tired enough and third... me, being the “control freak” would feel better doing the mowing and fourth... I know what the yard is like, pretty much, having spent all this time cleaning it up so.... There we have it!) All of this “doing” was an entire day. I don't know why or how, but it did fill the entire day but by 17.01 the front door framing was complete and I (having put “meal” into the oven at 16.00) got to sit to shove chicken and potato and ice cream down my throat and call it “nourishment”. - OK! ON A ROLL... It was time to take my drawing-room back today! Tonight's forecast? 6°. Not too cold, really, but then, to come, is... the HEAT! But I'm tired of the chaos in that room now, between all the seedlings and the tools scattered about. SO... it was OFF TO PLANT! In the back garden... the “Steak Sandwich” tomatoes and some more beets, more spinach... and as I was planting, Julius came rolling in. We chatted about the lawn-mowing and indeed, he did say that he'd leave it to me... as I'd thought. NO PROB THERE! Next on the agenda... the sun-flowers along the South wall. I don't know that any of them will take, but I took the rest of the seeds and put them into the little holes dug for the seedlings. What will come, will come, what will not, will not, but all is left to be seen. (There's no rain in the forecast until next Wednesday so there's to be some watering to be done... looks like I'll have to get a watering can for that.) Ah... not satisfied with the removal of that much... the marigolds went in as well... By 20.12 it was FINALLY time to “wrap the day, call it done and leave the rest - the door - for tomorrow”. I DID IT! FILLED THE HOURS OF THE DAY! (More like STUFFED it, packed it, with “busy”.) I brought the little frosting containers in, put them in the basin to wash and, purely by accident, rang Donna. So we chatted a bit for a while as I washed-up. - Then came my “error”. Intending only to chat a bit, the phone at about 68 per-cent charge, I rang Theresa and from there? Well... as it does... the evening rolled into the night and the night into the morning. During the chatting, I managed to down 2 v-tons... and WHY I did so, I've no idea, but I did. Thankfully, not too quickly... there was more than enough time to deal with them. Yes, a delight to chat with Theresa but... REALLY... the next thing I knew, I looked at the clock on the stove... IT WAS GOING FOR 2.00 ON FRIDAY MORNING! I'd wanted to shower before bed tonight but... 'twas NOT to be! - At about 2.10... I put the sleeping-bag on the bed, get me un-dressed and... in all sincerity and seriousness... LIGHTS OUT! WHAT A DAY THIS HAS BEEN! JUST... OMG WOW! - Oh... on note in closing: Ms. Nell stopped by to fetch her post as I was working on the door and we chatted. She and hubby came here to New Russia from... THE NORTHEAST KINGDOM! IMAGINE? AND HER TAKE ON THE GRAND STATE OF VT IS SO VERY SIMILAR TO MINE! Yes, they LOVED the scenery and all, but HER disgust was because the folks of the Kingdom are “too 'conservative'” as she put it. Well m'darllin', (and I didn't dare to say), you and hubby sprout from New Jersey, Ms. is a Black woman, Mr. is a White man... love and happiness were certainly NOT in the cards... ESPECIALLY in the wilds of the Kingdom! But... nice to know that my sentiments are matched, where the “Green Mountain State” is concerned. - I lay the day to rest and roll into...
Fri.22.May: 8.13 Here we go... the first thing I need to do is to catch-up on yesterday because.... it was ANOTHER 2.00-TO-BED MORNING, THIS. CHATTING WITH Ms. THERESA! AND... A 2-V-TON NIGHT. At least I managed to sleep right through until the 8.00 alarm (7.45 on the house-clocks) so there's 6 hours “rest” any-way. Not “too” terribly terrible for the run. But... there's the “I want to go back to bed”... in spite of the brilliant sun-shine in clear skies AND... THE TREES ARE GREEN THIS MORNING AND THE WINDOWS WERE OPEN THROUGH THE NIGHT... BED-ROOM, DRAWING-ROOM AND KITCHEN and it's COMFORTABLE IN HERE... which means... HOT OUT THERE! - That said... let's get back to yesterday's detail of the after-noon-into-evening-into-night-into-morning.... - 9.15 Finally caught up with the entry for yesterday, the Pee-Oh is open, Ms. Suzie in residence. I've had 2 smokes and am on 3rd coffee. 'tis time to figure what comes first with the agenda. There's a lawn to mow, I need to run into town for some clamps to help with the “ripping” of the door. Then there's the painting of said door and the installation. Not really a very much to do but... I'm just waiting for New Russia to wake up and I'll get the mowing done first, or, depending on how this rolls, perhaps the run into town. Sadly, I NEED the clamps. (To think... there are so many in the barn at 5199.... oh well.) - But it will be a day of “busy” again... But lawn and door are primaries. - Truthfully? I'd like to just go back to bed this morning... or to some glade to snooze in the sun-shine. - Looking across at yon mountains... “Bald” is greening, “Greene” is still brown. There's still a chill to the hill-tops but, it looks to be a “toasty” day to come. Tonight will be interesting... to see what all gets accomplished during the day. But, the only way to see that is... to be there when the day ends. And THIS is a “Holiday” week-end... Monday is “Memorial Day”... the “planting day”... and my personal planting is complete... until such time I might stumble upon some-thing else to put in around the place. My MAIN hope: that the veggie seedlings start to sprout... SOON! (As I said to Donna yesterday: If I'm still alive next year, I'll start all of this MUCH sooner. But, for now... live, learn and move along.) - 13.00 Lawn MOWED by noon! Now on to the door... ANXIETIES! - 23.00 *** THE SCREAM DOOR IS INSTALLED ON THE FRONT DOOR! I HAD TO CUT THREE SIDES TO MAKE IT FIT AND WITH THE JIG, IT TOOK HOURS TO DO SO! BUT I WENT TO AUBUCHON'S THIS MORNING, GOT THE C-CLAMPS (and a watering can), FOUND A GOOD STRIP OF WOOD IN THE GARAGE AND MADE “EASIER” WORK OF IT TO BE SURE THE CUTS WERE STRAIGHT. *** AND *** I MOWED THE LAWN THIS MORNING AS WELL! YES! MOWED THE LAWN! ALL OF IT, EVEN THE LITTLE AREA BESIDE Nr. 5's PORCH! (Nobody noticed, of course, but fukkem, seriously. I did it, I know I did it and it looks better... not perfect, not according to my personal preference, but it's done... even beside the garage!) AND I MANAGED TO PUT ON 3 COATS OF BLACK PAINT (though it isn't as shiny as I would have liked but it's OK... quite). AND MANAGED “MEAL” AT 17.00! AND AT 18.00, PUT THE LAST COAT OF PAINT ON AND BROUGHT THE DOOR INTO THE HOUSE AND INSTALLED IT! *** NOTING: IT NEEDS STRIPS ON TOP AND ON THE “HANDLE” SIDE BECAUSE THE FUCKING DOOR FRAME ISN'T PLUMB. BUT I CAN TAKE CARE OF THAT AS TIME GOES BY WITH FURRING OR WEATHER STRIPPING OR SOMETHING. OH, AND I EVEN INSTALLED THE “GRABBER” SO THE DOOR IS SECURED WHEN SHUT! ASIDE FROM THE FACT THAT SOME OF THE BLACK PAINT DRIPPED A BIT ON THE “BACK SIDE” OF THE DOOR (facing in), I MUST SAY THAT I'M QUITE PLEASED... AND THE TIMING IS PERFECT BECAUSE TONIGHT IT'S GONE QUITE WARM. I'M SITTING HERE NOW, FRESH OUT OF A “SCRUB SHOWER”, V-TON AT HAND AND THE FRONT DOOR IS OPEN! *** AND THE FAN IS ON IN THE BED-ROOM WINDOW, NICE AND SNUG AND SECURE, WITH A *FULL* SCREEN ON THE WINDOW! BY GOD! THIS PLACE IS TURNING INTO “MY HOME” MORE AND MORE AND MORE... SLOWLY... BUT MORE AND MORE AND MORE! *** IT'S REALLY QUITE A DELIGHT! *** - That said... This morning I had to QUEUE to get into Aubuchon's! “One out, one in”. Fucking bollocks, this shit! So I went in, got the C-clamps and watering can, the old guy came by to tell me that they got the fertiliser in. “10-10-10”... I distinctly said I wanted “5-10-10” but even then, at almost 20$ for 25lbs they can shove it. After that little fiasco, I came right back home and mowed the lawn in the BRUTAL HEAT! Thankfully, I was left alone. Nobody came by to comment or such and I'm pleased enough about that. - Lawn mowed, I got right to work on the door and by noon exactly, was under-way with that project. (Yes, all told, it DID take me almost 11 hours from start to finish but hey... the door's open tonight and AIR is circulating in the house again, at long, LONG last!) - Hanna came home and mentioned that BEEF WILL BE UP TO 11$/POUND COME SUNDAY! THE “CHEAP” SHIT! Not to mention, their (“Tops'”) beef never really agrees with me any-way. So for 11$ (or more), they can shove their beef up their fuck-holes. - AND THE NAPROXEN ARRIVED TODAY AS WELL! NOT DUE UNTIL THE 26TH, IT WAS ON THE FRONT PORCH AT ABOUT 18.00! LEAVE IT TO UPS! Perfect timing, now that I've been so busy all day today. Yes, I've taken one already and will “wash it down” with the v-ton. - Chatted with Theresa this evening after meal because the 565 number is now indicating “Alden” for her number. I wondered why Alden would ring me so I just tapped “dial” and there was Theresa! Something is SO fucked with this phone now. - Anyway... time to shop for a “Bionaire” window fan... whilst I can afford one and NEED IT!
Sat.23.May: 1.00 Day's DONE! I'm off to bed! (With a screen door and a window fan. And it's 16° out there... and I'm wearing a sherpa. Thankfully... not 5.00 alarm set for tomorrow. I'm in “no rush”.) - Oh... ordered a “Bionaire” fan. Should be here next week. - 15.42 IT'S BEEN *NON-STOP* ***ALL DAY***!!! SCREAM-DOOR IS NOW BUG-PROOFED. THREE LOAVES OF BREAD JUST OUT OF THE OVEN (and chicken in). WHITE WASHES ON THE RACK IN THE SUN-SHINE. NONE OF WHICH I INTENDED TO TOUCH. THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MY “DAY OF REST”! HAH! - Reluctantly and against my will, I got out of bed at 9.30, put the coffee on, got dressed and dragged the “whites” to the kitchen basin where they went in for a soak as I had my coffee and tried to get my mind together. Ah, but... looking at the screen door bothered me so I went out to the garage and hauled in a grand length of “moulding”, as it were. I measured the furring strip that I had in the drawing room and it would have done well-enough but the moulding looked better and was just slightly narrower. WELL? OUT CAME THE TAPE MEASURE AND SAW AND... The upper part of the door got “enclosed”. Ah but yes then, there were the sides! No sense having the top done and the sides not. So... measure, saw again. - AS this was going on, the “typical fuckerie du jour du monde”: Vivian came and dropped 2 cans of paint on the porch and said nothing until she saw me out back sawing. White and off-white paint... Either for the drawing room or the kitchen or... very nice of her, had it not been for the mention that the only way to “properly” dispose of paint is to wait for the “HazMat” day at the dump. So? Hey. I got paint. Fine. THEN CAME THE COMMENTS ON THE SCREEN DOOR! VERY LOVELY BUT... “BLUE” WOULD BE NICER. “I have a lot of 'rich' blue. It would look really nice with the 'New Russia' sign.” Yes, it might, but (a) I don't like all that much blue... this is The North Country and blue is a cold colour and I don't want blue and (b) I painted the door black because I like the fact that it's not blatantly obvious with the rest of the house and I've already put in the money, time and effort and *I* reside here so... No like? No look. Easy-peasy light and breezy. Buh by. (No, I didn't say any of that but...) ***THEN*** Jeff comes over to say “I left you a present behind the garage.” He'd “taken his loppers” to some of the limbs on the East side of the garage... *** AND LEFT THEM LAYING THERE ***!!! “I don't know what you want to do with them.” YOU CUT THEM... YOU TAKE THEM! FUKTARD! (No, again, I didn't say.) Any-way, I don't know where they went to but I don't see them from the house but I'm sure they're there... NOT touching them today. - Next... ALVIN comes along to chat, I mention the window up-stairs and he walks away and moments later... A PIECE OF GLASS FOR THE UP-STAIRS WINDOW! OK. Yes, I appreciate all the “contributions” but it's all MORE WORK FOR ME! Sensibly, there's no rush and I'll get to every-thing as I get to it. And I've got other things to do FOR ME, DIRECTLY, around here, so the rest will wait. - When every-body went back to their respective corners, I managed to get back to the DOOR! Top done. Sides done. Cut a strip of screening and thumb-tacked it to the bottom and so, now, as I sit here at table, a bit of a breeze blowing through the house, the aroma of the “peppered chicken” roasting, replacing the aroma of baked bread... the front door is open, things out-side are relatively calm, the sun is BLASTING in a clear, HOT, HOT, HOT sky and I SO want to snooze! - OH... and Sean, across the road, came by to actually CHAT! Funny shit though: Being kindly and neighbourly, I offered “If you ever need an extra hand...” and sure as shit... “Come by tomorrow any time after 8.” DUCKY! AND, by the way... He's from Millbrook! Dutchess county! Well indeed, I'm back... BACK IN NY! - 16.02 and there goes my snooze-time. - I still have to get rid of finger nails and clean the drawing room AND NANCY AND PAUL JUST PULLED-UP TO INVITE ME TO THE “HALFWAY HOUSE” FOR DRINKS! This place is a mess, I'm in need of a snooze. So off they've gone. But for me... the best of it is that the Halfway House is “open”... under secrecy and wraps. - 16.09 Off to snooze whilst the chicken roasts. What I'll have with is anybody's guess... but here we are. A DAY FULL OF BUSY! - 16.19 WELL! HERE'S THE SHIT!!! JUST CHECKED THE AMAZON ORDER.... PAYMENT DECLINED... WHY? BECAUSE INSTEAD OF SUBTRACTING THE BILL FROM RICHIE... I FUCKING ADDED IT!!! I'VE GOT OVER-DRAFTS UP MY SHIT-HOLE! I'M FUCKED! AND OF COURSE IT HAPPENS ON SATURDAY! FUCK ME FUCK ME FUCK ME!!! - 23.58 Texting with Theresa for quite the while this evening as the temperatures finally drop. Had a v-ton and naproxen just to be closer to sure of a good night's sleep. - The computer fucked up a bit this evening! Suddenly cut me off the Internet as it ran an episode-run of “Countdown” and I snoozed for about 40 minutes! I tried re-starting but it wouldn't come back up! So a shut-down and I tidied the drawing room, re-started, ran all the “up-dates” and an “off-line” scan and I'm back up. But... it's frightening! Especially now when I don't even know how much (little?) I have in the banque! - Anyway... Theresa found some videos of Split Rock falls down the road and sent them along. I STILL can't believe I'm HERE! It brought me to tears! - Time to try for some sleep. Let's see what the night drops on me and what tomorrow shoves up my arse.
Sun.24.May: 15.41 ALL DAY!!! ALL DAY!!! ALL DAY!!! I was OUT OF BED AT 8.15, put on the coffee, pondered putting in the glass up-stairs but needed some kind of tape and adhesive. INSTEAD... I GOT TO WORK ON RECONCILING THE CHEQUING ACCOUNT... MANUALLY... ON LEDGER PAPER... FROM THE VERY BEGINNING OF THE ACCOUNT, DAY ONE, OPENING AND ALL THE WAY THROUGH! I *BELIEVE* I'VE MANAGED AND WOW! WHAT A FUCK-UP! AND DOWN TO 39$! IF AMAZON PUTS THROUGH THE CHARGE FOR THE FAN. WELL... THAT TOOK MOST OF THE MORNING AND INTO THE AFTER-NOON. AND, BEING PISSED-OFF WITH MY-SELF BECAUSE OF THE BANQUE ERROR... I ATTACKED THE DRAWING-ROOM... WITH A VENGEANCE! BOXES CAME OUT, TOOL BOXES GOT SORTED, SHIT WENT INTO THE GARBAGE, TIE-BACKS GOT MADE FOR THOSE CURTAINS IN THERE AND JUST NOW... I GOT TO HOOVER THE HOUSE! ALL DAY!!! THE ENTIRE DAY!!! NOT EVEN TIME TO TAKE A TEA BREAK! AND NO SOC.MED. JUST CONSTANT, STEADY WORKING! And no, I never did get up to replace the window, but right now, I don't much care. - Ran the up-dates on the computer because it was giving me “messages” so I believe all's current on this thing. (It's a matter of time before it crashes and dies, I've no doubt.) And now? Pasta for “meal” tonight. And I'm not even in the mood to cook THAT much. But... - It just feels rather strange though... having worked all morning (thankfully, it wasn't too hot nor too humid) and now it's about time for meal, and then it will be time to go to bed again. Just feels as if I've wasted an entire day. But the house is in order (again... for a while). So I suppose it wasn't really a “waste”. - Now, I need a snooze... - 21.46 Well... the banque account is reconciled. I have to re-do the spread sheets. The drawing room is almost to where it should be... at least the table's cleared, the curtains have tie-backs. And the house is hoovered and all is well. - I've had a v-ton with naproxen. My right thigh is “jabbing” a bit tonight. - Meal was spaghetti with a tomato sauce, as it were. Ice cream after. And I had cookies with vodka. - Soc.med. was annoying. - I'm tired and so... off to bed. The house is “closed” for the night. It's been... “a day”. - Some text messages from Theresa but they've stopped. I suppose she too, is tired these days. - It's a nice, cool evening. Good to have the bed-room windows open. - For some reason, I feel I should shower, but I did nothing to warrant so... off to bed... with hopes of sleep! - Oh... I sent a humble, apologetic e-mail to Train North.
Mon.25.May: 5.48 “Memorial Day”... The “Planting Day”, when the food crops go to the earth. And the sky is a beautiful shade of a slightly grey blue, the sun is coming up and the ridge is actually showing indications of “green” o'er yonder. There's a breeze blowing... not hot, not warm, but comfortably cool. But there's so much light that it doesn't seem as early in the day as it is. And it's quiet out there. I'm dressed, coffee at hand, in from a smoke and a morning greeting to the pair of Hummies. Another day commences. When I'm truly “awake”, I'll head up to fix the window and then... we shall see what comes of the rest of this day. Right now, I'm “coming out of the night's “fog”... I slept almost through the night. One slight “attack” in the right leg, but it didn't last. That was at about 2.00. But by about 22.30, the lights went out and that was that. Vodka and naproxen... quite the nice way to end the day. (I'll be needing more vodka soon... and vitamin C too.) - Had a bit of a DREAM at some point:
I was in Newburgh... lower Broadway... the locals, fed up with the bull-shit down there, had turned the entire stretch from about Grand to the river, into a massive market. Stalls and shelves had been set-up all along and on the sides. I was amazed at how they'd simply taken the area over, finished with the “sequestering” and the “quarantine” and the general dilapidation of the area. And I walked through a section of produce, all local. The “market” hadn't opened as yet and people were getting things together, cleaning and such. And the size of the cabbages, greens and such was astonishingly HUGE! I was allowed to stroll along and look. At one point, I wanted, so much, to buy as much as I possibly could, for the food and to support the effort, but I only had my banque card, so I had to find a banque machine where I could get cash. (Imagine... the banque card is playing on my mind that much). I needed to get food and I knew it was difficult to get these days and this was an opportunity too good to let pass... And the dream ended....
Now, thinking about it... the exhaustion of the people with the “government control” and irresponsibility... in Newburgh of all places, taking their town back, as it were. And the pre-occupation with the need and availability of food... and the banque card... How much of “life” is gnawing a niche into my unconscious. - Anyway... I'm up and about, not really looking forward to the journey up-stairs. But I DID happen to “find” the tape I was looking for yesterday, that I thought I'd run out of... it was RIGHT THERE, on the shelves in the drawing-room! The very tape I'd used to make the screens! Honestly... I need to get that room together better. But then... there's painting to be done in there as well. I still want that “blue” gone and now there's some white paint to be used. (I'll try to “tint” it to just the slightest grey... - Agenda? Well, there's the window... there's the back yard and that pile of dirt. And I need to budget for Wednesday. I need smokes, tonic, cranberry juice. Oh... there are “things” to be done... and I don't want to do any of them. What I'd rather do instead? I don't really know. I just don't want to do what I feel I ought. - The “kids” (next-door) will be off to work soon... a house to m'self again today. And it appears that it might be a bit over-cast. - Last night, the winds blew about the place some-thing harsh. Good thing I'd closed the living-room. - Well, what will be of this day will be seen... at it's end. - 20.33 AND A BEAUTIFUL DAY WASTED IN A MISERABLE MOOD, TRYING TO RECONCILE THE CREDIT UNION AND MYSELF WITH THE LOSS AND STUPIDITY! - I tried to fix the window up-stairs... the glass is the WRONG size AND as soon as I started working... HORNETS! “YELLOW JACKET” HORNETS ABOUT 3cm LONG! SO? And THEN THE GLASS FELL OUT ONTO THE PORCH ROOF, SO I GOT THE LADDER AND GOT IT BACK, CLEANED IT UP AND... THAT WAS THE DAY. - Oh... a non-HF10s. But it was about 90 minutes anyway. I suppose it'll suffice. - Meal... chicken with black-eyed peas and veggies, ice cream. - Re-did the spread sheet. Balanced. - Now to ring Theresa because she's been in a piss mood all day too. I'll apologise for being a shit, the take my shower and go to bed. - Am having v-cran with naproxen. Good thing the order arrived for the new... it was the last of the VT bottle! VT is slowing disappearing from this house. - I'm EXHAUSTED! - Oh... and I NEED SMOKES! Will HAVE to go tomorrow. Thankfully, there's money in the VT acct.
Tue.26.May: 8.50 Up. Dressed. Coffee'ed. Last smoke smoked. Bright sun. “Moving air”. And a forecast of... 31°! So much for THIS day of any sort of “work” out-of-doors. And the usual anxiety sickness associated with having to run the truck, which I will do momentarily. And the Pee-of-Oh only JUST opening. Goodness gracious me. But it's about the stomach troubles. Bad enough that it was ANOTHER “2.00 TO BED” last night, and 3 alarms this morning. I'm in a state. And there's the pending possible potential response to the e-mail to the credit union... and the congestion in the chest, the sinuses are acting-up... Summer's here, the time is right, for dancing back to bed! BUT... off to FamDoll. I need smokes. (Need vodka and tonic too but no today Josephine.) - Well? I'm up and about and out. Let's get this done before the heat. Hopefully, a round-trip with-out glitches. - 11.36 Well, the sun is still shining and the temperature is still rising toward that 31° mark AND... I MADE IT INTO TOWN FOR SMOKES (and a binder to keep manual register of accounts)! THE MOMENT I WALKED BACK IN, I RANG THE CREDIT UNION AND SPOKE WITH THE MOST AMAZING YOUNG GAL WHO KEPT TRYING TO CONSOLE ME, WAS ACTUALLY READING MY E-MAIL AS WE SPOKE AND REVERSED THE OD CHARGES AND TOLD ME “We understand.” AND “Actually, the money that covered the cheques is yours, we just charge the 5$ as a fee for the transfer.” BUT SHE KEPT TRYING TO CONSOLE ME AND ASSURE ME THAT SHE'S FORWARDING MY E-MAIL TO SUPERVISOR SO THAT THE REST OF THE BANQUE IS AWARE AND THAT I NEEDN'T BE SO WORRIED... MY REPUTATION IS STILL FINE AND THEIR TRUST IN ME IS STILL IN TACT! OH HAPPY DAY! - Meanwhile, I'm NOT looking forward to today's heat. The humidity is already up toward 70%. Thankfully the front door is open. And no, I'm not feeling all too “well” with this heat but... the morning moves into after-noon and we shall see what's to come. - (I could use a shower but I'll wait until this evening.) - 16.27 AND 30° !!! The front porch is unbearable, the rest of the house is HOT and chicken is in the oven. Had I thought at all, I SHOULD have put in 4 pieces but... too late now. Mayhaps later tonight... when the world cools. - I SNOOZED... for about TWO HOURS... primarily because of the heat. But one thing I MUST say: THANK GOODNESS I PUT THAT SCREEN DOOR IN WHEN I DID. At least the air MOVES in the house now. - But what a wasted day. And truthfully? I don't much care. Looks like it's about to return to “late nights”. Early rise... do what can be done... sleep... stay up later. - Concern? The kids next door. Hanna's laid mulch... by their walk and around their garden. Quite silly, really, and just tossed. Why? Not a clue. But... And I see somebody started to UN-cover the oil tank in the back yard. I start working on things and SOME-body HAS to “get involved”. I'm not going to bother with/about it. - OK... so... time to get some-thing responsible accomplished, like getting ready for tomorrow's bill-paying. It's going to be a tight month ahead, with the electric bill, but things will be paid... this morning's chat with the credit union was encouraging. - On we go... indeed. - 16.34 AND HOW HANNA IS OUT THERE MOWING THE FUCKING LAWN! WTAF? OK... let's see how this rolls... I'm becoming disenchanted. (Tomorrow... more vodka... I'll NEED more to drink at this rate.) Nothing makes sense at the moment. Best to leave it alone. - 22.05 It was about 16.15 when the phone rang, I'd just put the chicken in the oven... Nancy... inviting me up to drinks and dinner! Well, I felt I HAD to attend, for, at least, drinks, so I got me together, watched The Five, took a quick shower and walked up. “Tommy”, who lives up the road, and “Mary” (I believe) who lives in Port Henry, were there. It's Tommy's birthday. WELL! The reception was magnificent! Dinner was BBQ chicken (cooked by Paul) with pasta and potato salads and v-tons! WE HAD A BLAST! And their house is incredible! The views were SO “Catskills” wilderness! And as we talked I realised... they're at least “Repubs”! We didn't get into politics but it was just rather “stated”. Oh... and NO “social-fucking-distancing”, we all sat at table, and no “face masks”. At the end, about 21.00, as I was getting ready to leave to walk back home, Nancy and I chatted a touch. Come to find out, folks in NR have been under the impression that *I'M* some-what “stand-offish”! I told Nancy why I keep to my-self and she said “Then what I thought all along is true... Jess is a bitch.” THERE! So THAT explains the “coldness”! 10 months of this bull-shit! And so, it closed with I'm invited to a trip into Port Henry tomorrow evening, with Nancy, to Mary's house, where we'll have “Michigans” and drinks. They're a BEAUTIFUL bunch of people! And on the walk home, down Simonds Hill, I took photos of the night sky and thought... “I AM HOME!” - And right now, the windows are open, the fan is in the bed-room, I'm sweating, it's HOT. I've watered the “kitchen” garden and sent off a miserable complaint about the RTSs from the PO. - Meanwhile, tomorrow's rent cheque is written and ready to post, the “budget” has been done with a bit of money left (to my shock). I'm going to finish MY vodka (with something to mix... probably the left-over “lemonade” mix) and tonight, I can go to bed with “PEACE” in my soul. “A change is about to come” to New Russia... and in my life... for the better... again. - Oh... Tommy lived here, in this place, for 6 months... 30 years ago! My “connections” are coming. And Paul? From Staten Island! Howzboutdat?
Wed.27.May: 7.33 Even I can't believe this... THE BILLS ARE PAID! The sun is shining, the breezes are blowing, the temperature isn't unbearable (yet), the humidity is approaching but not horrific (yet) and the bills are paid! I'm dressed, coffee at hand, have had morning smoke... and the bills are paid (except, of course, the TN loan which has to wait until the 1st because the web-site won't process “pend”, but that's fine...). And it's another day. Let's see what kind of shit will hit the fan before it's done. Shall we? Oh yes, indeed, let's shall! (Not that I give a particular shit.) - 19.50 STILL MISERABLY HOT! The flowers and gardens are watered. Poor things. Tomatoes in the back are gone. Tomatoes in the kitchen garden are barely there. But a woman at the Pee-Oh said, this morning, that she's planting seeds and it really isn't at all too late so... we shall see. - Had it out with Ms. Crystal today. She PHONED about the complaint about my RTS mail and then SCREAMED: “I DON'T TOUCH YOUR MAIL!” I never said she did. But I told her that I've had enough of the disrespect, that I'd specifically said I wanted an e-mail reply so that the response is documented and she started in on some tangent so I rang off and phoned the USPS complaint number. A “Chris” rang back and was a delight. The matter's gone to “Consumer Affairs”. We shall see the shit fly now and I don't give a shit. (Chris's first comment on the phone was “Uh oh... 27 years with the post office. I'm in trouble here.” It was a delight talking with him. He was a carrier for 5 years.) - I've “deactivated” G's, Author and Woodhauler on Minds today. Those shit-bags started “tagging” posts on G's as “NSFW Profanity”... it was an animation of a man blowing bubbles with kittens in them! So? So... we walk away. - Told Theresa via text. She just said “It's their loss” and “Sad”. Fuck-off. - And Nancy never rang so luckily, I had a piece of chicken in the fridge and the tin of beets in the cupboard. I made “pickled beets” to go with the chicken and had a slice of cream cheese with a sprinkle of sugar on for dessert. - Am finishing the vodka with some iced tea I've made today. - And it's HOT and HUMID and I'm exhausted from it. - Tomorrow I'll tripple into town for a red pen for the manual book-keeping and smokes and... - OH! SPOKE WITH ALDEN TODAY! I RANG HIM! It seems he WON'T be back up this way for the rest of the year. He's lost his Aunt (103 years old) to the flu and is in “Super Panic” now. They “order” groceries, shop on Amazon, literally WASH EVERY-THING before it comes into the house. He's got an entire out-fit for the process including boots and a welder's mask. He's 73 and afraid. I can't blame him. But he gave his permission to work on the cellar shed and was most thankful for my rent-paying “early” all the time. “I appreciate that and having you in the house.” - SO there was GREAT things for this other-wise wasted, hot, humid day. - Sunday night is back to single-digits for a couple of days. Relief! Let's see if I can hold out. This is playing havoc on my chest. - Soon... a quick cooling shower and to bed. The fan's on in the bed-room as I type at the kitchen table. - 21.28 Well... had a brief but “fun” intercourse with some idiot from Minds... on Twitter. A few texts to/from Theresa who seems disinterested in continuing conversation (now that I'm no longer on Minds?). And I need a brief shower and a bit of reading so... I'm off to the shower and to bed. Quick shopping tomorrow for stuff and then... probably another rather wasted day to follow... due to heat. BUT... 4° on Sunday night!
Thu.28.May: 5.38 Why I'm up and about is anybody's guess this morning. But there's a touch of over-cast to the sky, the air is “moving” and the temperature is quite below what it was when I went to bed last night. A relief. The bath towel is in on the soak, coffee on the steep, I'm in from a smoke on the porch with the Hummies and the day is on the roll. Shame, really, that the liquor store won't open for another 5 hours, and the market, not for another 2 and FamDoll for I'm not sure when. I could be out on the road attending to all of that. But, I suppose this is fine. - General “health”? Nothing out of the “usual”, a touch of chest, a bit of stomach... “old age” and the likes. Not looking forward to any probable “confrontations” as a result of yesterday's “postal activities”. But I HAVE signed-up for “Informed Delivery”, at the recommendation of “Chris” yesterday. A “code” will be sent, via post, first class, and we'll see how it all works out. Says Chris, they “scan the first 10 pieces” of mail and says the site, I can get “grey-scale” images of same. So we shall see. Not sure how that would work with “RTS” and “mis-sorts”, it all depends on when/where the “scan” takes place. But I DO imagine it's before it gets to E-Town, probably in Albany. So we shall see how it goes. And I'm wondering when I'll hear from “Consumer Affairs”. Oh well... I've little-to-no doubt that there are “those” of Ms. Biddy's cronies who aren't thrilled with me. But the fact of the matter is that the home-owner is fine with my presence. “I appreciate you being in the house.” - Meanwhile, 'tis a day of “reduced soc.med.” and I shouldn't doubt, communications with Ms. Theresa. Although, my messages to her about my disgust with Minds wasn't too different from Linda's tirades of yore. A touch different, but not “too much different”. Oh well... fine then. - Anyway, the day's on the move, the night turns to day, darkness to light and here we go. Let's see how it all rolls... when the rolling is done. (I have to think of meal this evening too.) - At least ALL of the bills are either paid or budgeted! That, in and of itself is quite comforting. - 9.07 Suzie's in, and I'm pondering whether or not to be “pre-emptory” about the complaint with E-Town... but leaning more toward just letting it ride for the moment to see what comes of it. - Other-wise, feeling quite “tired” this morning. Took an hour's snooze from 7-8.00. It's still cool enough to be “comfortable” this morning. Maybe that's the issue: the “relax” from the heat. I don't know. - The bath towel is on the drying rack on the back porch, coffee pres is clean and the day... continues. “Things” I'd like to do but just don't have the interest or energy. Well? We just move along. I'll be out of here in a bit, into town... hopefully the truck will hold for the “there” AND “return”. It's always about the truck. - 15.07 WELL... Marketing is done! I THINK I left at about 12.30, and I THINK I got back at about 14.00. I KNOW I got TWO bottles of vodka, then on to the market for franks, chicken, tonic (of course), tinned beets and chickpeas, ice cream (Tops' brand... let's see how shitty this is), eggs, juice, pasta... there was FOOD in there today! Imagine! AND... still over 100 on the FS! YAY! Stopped at FamDoll for red pen... and the only thing they had was “gel”, which Casey recommended and, come to find out... TOO THICK so... back to try again else-where or wait for the trip to Ticonderoga and Walmarde? What-ever. When I got back, the chicken got “wrapped” for the freezer and the franks were on sale, Nathan's... hmpf... but 14 for about 8$ so tonight... franks and some-thing for “meal”. - Ah... BUT... NOTE... AS I WAS SITTING AT THE WORK-TABLE, ON-LINE FOR A MOMENT... THE BLOODY-FUCKING EASTERN-MOST SCREEN FLEW ALMOST OFF! THE HOUSE IS SHIFTING WITH THE CHANGES OF TEMPERATURE! THE CLIP ON THE SCREEN DOOR ISN'T HOLDING THE DOOR TIGHTLY EITHER. FUCK ME! Oh well... - And I spoke with Suzie, at length, this morning, about my complaint, assuring her that I made certain to mention that it's NOT HER! So we shall see where it all leads. Not that I care... other than some assurance of sending and receiving my post! - Meanwhile, it's cooler today and over-cast with quite the breezes. - Theresa sent word on another soc.med. site where Minds-folks are moving to. I'm signed-up and in. Already found Minds-folks. Not too thrilled about it all but... we shall see. - Right now I feel I could use a snooze. Just in from nailing the screen back in. - But I'm relieved about the marketing... made it there and back and managed to get what was on my list and a touch more and... here I am. - 22.05 THOUGHT I was watching “Bridge on the River Kwai” until it got almost to the end.. OF THE FIRST FUCKING HALF OF THE MOVIE! I GOT ONLY HALF! HOW I HATE these shit-bags who post lies... “Full Movie”. Fuck! It's no wonder people trust no-one! Anyway... aside from market, the day was a bust and several naps were taken and franks with scrambled eggs was filling and the ice cream bought today is gone. Now? A smoke and to bed at last. Tomorrow? Who knows? Other than getting a red pen so I can re-make the accounting on paper over the week-end. Other than that? Well? There's 2 bottles of vodka in the freeze, 3 bottles tonic in the fridge and tonight, I don't want either. So that's quite good news. Oh... and it isn't miserably hot!
Fri.29.May: 4.40 (Juan Luis Guerra!) And, believe it or not, and I see no reason why it shouldn't be believed, not only am I up and typing, coffee is at hand, I'm dressed and in from smoke on this HUMID, some-what rather very over-cast morn AND the table cloth is hanging on the rack on the back porch, to... “dry”, which it won't do in THIS humidity. 22° and 82% humidity, indeed. Now, the “Why?” am I up and all at this hour... Well? I just woke at about 4.00 and that was that. I couldn't get comfortable in the bed and just decided that, since I was awake, I may as well be awake. There's nothing I can actually “do” at this hour, and even at that, I doubt I WOULD “do”, in this heat and humidity. Oh, the very thought that it's only going to get “warmer” as the day moves on is sickening. But, aside from getting a red pen (oh, the fixations), I can just go back to snooze at some point, and, no doubt, I shall. And yes, indeed, to be sure and certain, it's a “heavy-chested” morning as well. But with this oppressive humidity, it's no wonder. - Sitting on the porch, having a smoke, I had to ponder, as I do from time-to-time, when will be “the moment”... IF there is a “moment” and not some lingering horror, and when that moment comes, what of what's left behind... for example, my “remains”? Oh well, it all comes down to the same point of fact: Nothing is forever and when the “moment” arrives, there's nothing there-after so there's no sense in worrying about it. - Other-wise... along we go. I'd just prefer that the house be together and presentable. - Speaking of which, can't help but think that this is the time of year I dislike terribly because “the house” tends to smell of sweat. Horrid, that. And with all the work that Alden put into the place to make it smell better for me. Must be sure to keep the place clean. - Ah, so much for the silliness of the day. Let's see what more nonsense I can fill it with. It's Friday... not that that makes any difference to any one for any reason. - 21.55 V-ton at hand, the heat in the house is horrendous after the absolute DELUGES WE HAD THIS EVENING! The rains came-on so suddenly, then drifted away and then came back with a vengeance! - But I DID get into town this morning. Stopped at Kinney... NO BIC PENS! FUCK! But I got some zinc to take and some colour pencils (Crayola) and metalic “Sharpies” in silver and gold. Not as good as the others I've had but not bad... and cheap too! - Then walked up to Aubuchon's where I got another piece of glass for the window up-stairs. I called ahead and there it was at the cashe... FREE! So I got a little “cultivator” for the garden and a can of hornet spray for Monday morning's window-fix. Then... a stop at Tops for yoghurt, ice cream, horse radish... and back to the home-stead by noonish... to snooze, of course. - Meal was 5 franks, beans (regular, made to taste like baked), ice cream. The Five got cut off by the first storm so... Ootoob for a while. But of course, by 18.00, all was done and done. - Had a grand shower earlier so that's nice. My arm pit is SO ITCHY! I'm probably allergic to the tea tree oil but it's actually working so tonight, I'll let the skin settle before going at it again. - OH... AND NOW THERE ARE THREE HUMMIES vying for the feeder! And they're AMAZING! I stand in the front door and they come and hover there, staring at me! SO SWEET AND PRECIOUS! - Not really concentrating tonight. Just too hot and tired and trying to decide whether or not to go to the dump tomorrow. Not particular need to, but... - And Theresa's on the “text”. So? - It won't be too late a night though, that's for certain. - 23.06 I'd like, so much, to stay up and on soc.med. and listen to music and such but the one v-ton has hit and I'm exhausted. Theresa and I have signed-off so... with the little breeze (cool, I must say) coming in, time for last smoke. The v-ton's done and it appears... so too, am I.
Sat.30.May: 8.04 with over-cast skies, temp of 16° (indeed), not too chilly though, and, to be brutally honest, a heaviness in the chest that rises up the throat. In all honesty though, the sinuses feel a bit on the “packed” side as well. There's just that “pressure” over-all this morning. Congestion from head to thorax, as it were, I suppose. “Heavy”. But, I managed to stay in bed until about 7.30 this morning, after waking at 4.00 and then again at 6.00. It's Saturday and I've nothing “particularly pressing” on the agenda. - Just noticing, today Michael would have been 28 years old. Imagine... Nephew approaching 30. It's no wonder I'm feeling “old”. - And so, here we are, facing another day. Let's see how it all turns out. - I have to re-plant some potatoes in the kitchen garden. The rain, yesterday, washed the soil away. And there's a stack of “Adirondack Life” in the living-room that needs attending. Oh well... we shall see what gets accomplished... when this day has drawn to an end. So on and along we go.
Sun.31.May: 12.36 This will be brief because it's a rather “episodic” moment, as it's been, but, Theresa and I were on the phone until I finally got to bed at 5.01 this morning! It was rather fun, but shocking when I happened to notice the “blue” coming in through the curtains... not to mention about 3 v-tons through the night and I was still up and awake and about. AND THE FURNACE HAD TO BE TURNED ON AGAIN... AND IT RAN FOR A BIT BEFORE I GOT TO SLEEP AND IT'S RUN AGAIN THIS MORNING WENB I WOKE... AT 11.00! And it's been a very “slow going”. And the Cedar Vine seedlings on the front porch were “taken” by the cold over-night... MORE plants GONE! THIS is fucked-up! And tonight, to 4°... tomorrow night as well, followed by nights of 5° to come. Oh well... It seems, between yesterday's episode in the evening (which I didn't mention yesterday so... I'd put pasta in the pot to cook went back to the drawing room, looking through soc.med. and such when suddenly... THE ROOM SPUN AND THE HOT FLASHES CAME AND I KNEW... “***EPISODE***” AND SURE ENOUGH... SO I GOT OFF THE CHAIR, CRAWLED ACROSS THE FLOOR TO THE STOVE, TURNED IT OFF AND LAID ON THE RUG ON THE KITCHEN FLOOR FOR ABOUT 5-10 MINUTES. WHEN THESE EPISODES HIT I GET TO PREP FOR NOT COMING OUT OF THEM. I'VE NO IDEA WHAT BRINGS THEM ON BUT... even right now, today, this after-noon... I still feel “episodic”. I didn't when I woke at 9.00, nor when I got out of bed at 11.00 but it's “lingering” now. I got 6 hours sleep and am not hung-over, to be sure. But there's a “disconnect” some-where... Anyway... there's still coffee to finish and I'm not certain what else to “do”. It's about 11° last time I checked so it's a “cool” day, despite the sun-shine. I could do some digging in the back. I won't do any gardening because of the cold nights... and I'm tired of all the plant losses. Really. Fucked-up. Oh well... We'll see what this all leads to when this day too, has finished. - (I hope Theresa's OK today... after an all-nighter. Jeezus... like kids!) - 15.28 At about 12.30 or so, I took a lie-down on the futon and... JUST got up to go to the loo (again). WOW. An entire day, blown away. Meanwhile, the furnace is still kicking every now and again. It's not terribly cold out there, and the Cedar vines seem to be trying to recover, but I doubt they'll manage through the next two nights. And checking the forecast, there are MORE single-digit nights coming in the next fortnight. But I see the potatoes in the kitchen garden are coming along. The only thing to do is hope for no frost. This is quite odd, indeed. Thankfully, there are more seeds in the packets, but at this rate, there won't be a harvest until... who-knows-when... Christmas? Perhaps. - General “well-being” note: Still not quite “here”. Now I can't figure if it's the all-nighter last night, too much vodka, something “wrong” with something inside. Could it be the zinc I've started taking? Could it be an allergic reaction to the tea tree oil? Could it be some kind of “bug”? Could I have been bitten by some kind of insect? Could it be something... I don't want to mention it but I can't help but wonder... is it “my turn” for the CA? And if so, where so? My chest is as “normal” as it could be... for me. Not a lot of coughing and when I do, it's the usual, if not even less “production” that at other times. And today, it hasn't been “chunky”, as has been the case for most of the time. Oh... the wonders. And all day (since I got out of bed any-way) I've had one smoke and am just on the first full coffee. Quite the odd sort of day. - Tonight, I'll do my best to get into bed at a “civil hour”, hopefully sleep through the night and see about a “re-start” tomorrow. With today's chill and tonight's cold snap, tomorrow might be a good day to get up to repair the window. I thought I might have gotten some more of that dirt mound shovelled today but it won't be happening. No prob. - The kids are in next door... so I hear the foot-steps and their screen door. - And now it's time to prep a “meal”... chicken again, with veggies. Dessert will be “chocolate yoghurt” and after that... prepping for an early night to bed. - The THREE Humming-birds have been SO BUSY at the feeder today too. And when I just stepped out to finish the smoke I'd started earlier today, they were buzzing round and about me too. They're precious, they truly are. I hope they don't suffer with this cold snap. - Looking into a new “Soc.Med. Name” today. “Nordlander” seems to be quite good. “JKNordlander”. Yes, I like that... Get away from Woodhauler... though I still like that one very much. But it's time to “retire” him... So, prep tonight's meal and get on with that and see where the rest of the time leads us. I can only hope that it doesn't put me on the floor again, as it did yesterday evening. - I “know” things are running down now... and I can't help but think how perfectly “me” it would be, getting my little place here nicely together where I can enjoy it only to be ripped right out of and away from it all. (So far it looks like the fan and air fresheners and iron-on patches order is going fine... I'll get a proper fan for the bed-room and never get to use it. As I said to Theresa last night: I'll get the place settled, drop dead and Alden can rent the place for a bit more as “furnished”. As for the truck? Well, maybe he could include that as well... or sell it off. What-ever. It would all be typical “my existence”: Set every-thing up for the benefit of some-body else. Oh, alas, and fukkit... FUKKME! - 22.17 Well, the day finally comes to an end, later than I'd wanted, but still... OK, I suppose. I'd like to take a quick shower before heading to bed. Still not feeling quite “together”, but a bit better than most of the day any-way. - Temperature? Plummeting to 3°! This is bull-shit! The humming-birds! The seedlings! Bull-shit! And tomorrow night, only slightly higher. FUCK! What's going on with this shit? Tomorrow is JUNE! - That said, I was going to have a hot water before bed but I'm going to try to cut back on fluid in-take a touch. Maybe it'll help with the dizziness and heart and swelling fingers and such. I know... must mind the kidneys as well. Always some-thing. - Anyway... with the cold out-side, the FURNACE IS RUNNING! Thankfully not too long or too often but still, pisses me off. So much for the “full tank” come November (if I'm even breathing by then). - So now... last smoke, quick wash, to bed. Made it through the day... barely. Tomorrow? JUNE! (Fuck.)